Hey, good morning.
Right now it's 4:45. I'm up way earlier than usual because I've been tasked with waking up my baby sister for school. She's got to be at the bus stop by 6:40, so I've got a little less than two hours to get ready.
I'm going to be at home for the next six days, so I have 6 different tries to see what the most effective way to get her ass out of bed is. And this morning I'm going for the drill-sergeant approach.
Put that goddamned stuffed unicorn down! It's time to get up!
Wipe that drool off your face and put on those bunny slippers, NOW!
© Warner Bros. Entertainment
I'm gonna scare the shit out of her. I'm gonna throw a cold rag on her if she tries to lie back down. I'm gonna make her ass get up this morning.
Today I'm gonna be Gunnery Sergeant Alarm Clock but tomorrow I'm gonna be charming and persuasive. Like Brad Pitt, if he was an alarm clock.
Hey girl -
BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!
Peace...
No comments:
Post a Comment