Joe's (Totally Not) Diary

Friday, June 12, 2020

The ABC's of Reviewing Week 17: All That Remains Part 1

Ha! You thought I wouldn't come back, didn't you? Well, guess who was wrong?!?

But we don't have to discuss your lack of faith in me...

Although, I do find it disturbing.

All That Remains started when a jaded Phil Labonte (freshly kicked out of Shadows Fall for in his words "not being Brian Fair") met up with guitarist Oli Herbert, brothers Chris and Matt Bartlett, and bassist Dan Egan. They put out two demos in 99, did some touring and in 2002 put out their first record Behind Silence and Solitude.

Today we'll be listening to that record.

Behind Silence and Solitude

This track holds a special place in my heart. It was my first introduction to the genuine heavier sound of All That Remains. I was only really familiar with their songs like 'Two Weeks' and 'Not Fading'. And their record Madness had just come out. We won't be looking at that one for a while so here's a taste of how that record sounds.

I had no idea that this band could be hard. Let alone melodeath hard.

From These Wounds

Oli Herbert was like no other. I honestly pray that if there is someone to call responsible for his untimely death, they fucking pay for it.

It's not enough to hope he's shredding in heaven if his legacy can't have peace on earth.

I really like the intro solo. It's very melodic. I love the scream that transitions from the verses to the chorus. And this track has one of the first of many amazing Oli Herbert guitar solos. I know I say that a lot. But when I say an All That Remains song has a great solo, the solo must be on another level. Oli was a guitar wizard. And I will be honest, I cried when I heard that he died. He was one of the sole reasons I picked up a guitar myself.

Follow

Aw man, this is a standout ATR track. They've recorded it several times. And each time it gets better. Pay attention to the intro. If you just listen to the right ear, you'll just hear drumming and on the left, you'll hear Oli shredding the intro. They say stereo channeled music is more enjoyable. And I use how many times I've replayed this intro as an example to support that. This track just screams aggression man. It kicks off like a gunshot. Phil starts screaming the lyrics right after the intro. Everything about it just feels fast.

Clarity

This is the first track I had to really give thought to listening to. The intro is badass as usual. The same riff plays throughout the verses. But at this point, I realized this album was propelling itself off of how fast and aggressive it sounded. The transition to a slower tempo song feels a little strange. And this track feels like someone let a little air out of one of the tires. The solo definitely saves this song though. Oli starts going ham on the fretboard around the three-minute mark. And just when you think the song is going to end with this somber guitar solo it kicks back up and there's another chorus. And it fades out with some chugging.

Erase

Is it just me or does that opening riff sound like Davidian?

This track is good. Something about it is ensnaring. The guitar has just the right tone to it (I'd tune it up though.) The verse and the chorus transition so smoothly. And then Oli starts sweeping so hard you'd think he was the maid.

Now hear me out on this next point. The breakdown and the outro are good. But they feel like they're from a different song. It feels like they didn't know how to end this song and they had another song that was just an outro, so they mashed the two together. Both parts sound good but you can tell they don't go together. A bit like mixing an energy drink with alcohol.

Or like if this were a real person.

Shading

A lot of these tracks have the "intro - scream a bit - chorus - scream some more - chorus - solo - scream differently on top of a guitar solo - scream the chorus like a madman" structure. It works for this band because everyone is pretty good at what they do. The bass compliments the guitar really fucking well in the mix. I think Oli could improvise for hours. And this type of instrumentation compliments the type of screaming Phil is doing.

Home to Me

This was my favorite song for a while. All the good things about this band are on display in the first few seconds. Their guitarists are on point. The drummer is fantastic. The bassist is talented enough to keep up all the while doing his own thing (He's barely audible for a good bit of this song though. Fingers crossed for a remaster.) The vocalist works perfectly with it. Phil switches his vocal style for the only time on the whole record. Everything really shines in this track. This song has the most blatantly groovy solo of all the songs. To come onto the scene and be this good on your first record is rare.

One Belief

One word. Or is it two? Two words.

One portmanteau word - Melodeath. That sums up the feeling of this track.

I haven't understood a damn thing Phil has said this whole record (You'll be missing that by Madness.) but on this song, he's pretty comprehensible. And I like what he's saying. This track really has a proto-Killswitch Engage feel to it. The riffing, and the positive lyrics along with the out of control drumming and insane soloing really invoke early KSE. This is probably a leftover from Phil's Shadows Fall days. (He probably scrapped it because it wasn't about being depressed after his girlfriend left.)

Yes, these are real lyrics that a grown man wrote and recorded for a metal record...

Final Verdict

I like this record. It's been a while since I've listened to it and I like it even more than I remembered. Ultimately All That Remains is one of my favorite bands. I like every part of their career and each change of sound that came with it. I find it funny that they started off as a blend of groove and melodic death metal with no clean singing. When I was in Highschool I ate this sound up and I had a hard time finding bands that sounded like them. Which meant I spent whole days looking for music. Some of my favorites I found were Sunless Rise, Flatlined, Dreamshade, and Shadows Fall (their first two records). I don't know if you kids have easier ways of finding music these days but I had a hard time.

Behind Silence and Solitude Remastered and Reissued Album Cover © 2007 Razor & Tie Records
Darth Vader Picture © 1977 The Walt Disney Company
Oli Herbert Picture © 2015 Craig Bryon Photography (Dude has AWESOME PICTURES of every band. Check out his Facebook)
The Ides of March Poster © 2011 Columbia Pictures

Sunday, June 7, 2020

ABC's of Reviewing Week 16: All Shall Perish Part 2

Jesus Christ, what the fuck did you guys do to the country?

I leave for two months and y'all start rioting in the streets and burning shit to the ground because some shitty cop killed an amateur pornstar?

This shit is going downhill so hard, that even my old job got busted up (the one from the last few journal entries I posted). And to be honest, I ain't even that mad.

My shitlist has three names on it and they all belong to my ex-manager.
I have a feeling someone else might feel the same way.

But honestly, enough about that, you come here to escape from the dumpster fire we call reality.

Maybe if we ignore it, it will put itself out. Let's try that for a little while.

When we last left off, we were looking at All Shall Perish's second album The Price of Existence. The songs were kinda tedious and most of them sounded the same. This time we're tackling their last album to date, This Is Where It Ends.

Divine Illusion

It's pretty hard to talk bad about any of the songs on this album because I like it so much. This song in particular reminds me of Unhallowed-era Black Dahlia Murder with the way Eddie keeps switching from screaming to growling. As I was saying in the last review, All Shall Perish were pretty much to first bands to sound like this, and to write about this stuff (in their genre). Nowadays, this song sounds like standard deathcore fanfare so I won't award it too many points. But you do have to remember that for a while All Shall Perish was the embodiment of deathcore.

There Is Nothing Left

This is a good song. When Eddie screams he sounds like a helpless woman and a monster at the same time. This is one of those times when my words cannot describe how good the song sounds. The guitar tone is distinct. The bass is chugging and pounding along with the drums. This track is the equivalent of an aural juggernaut. You can feel it as you listen to it. And the lyrics are pretty decent, on top of all that.

Procession of Ashes

This track continues that unstoppable feeling from "There Is Nothing Left". It feels like that track's melancholic continuation. Eddie is still screaming, but this time he's harmonizing with a choir (or whatever you call that effect.) I'm honestly not afraid to say that this track is one of the best in the entire genre.

A Pure Evil

I don't have much to say about this song. Eddie sounds purely evil. Those guitar sweeps are evil. In fact, the guitarist is pretty damn good on this song. His playing is one of the best parts of this track. Especially the dual guitar solo towards the end. I vowed to stop reading the lyrics to the songs after the last review, so I don't know what this song is about. But goddamnit they 100% captured that apocalyptic atmosphere.

Embrace the Curse

I've got to commend these boys. If I had to pick one word to sum up the way this album sounds, its fucking evil. However, I'm not going to pull any punches here. This one really just sounds like 'A Pure Evil Part 2.' I'm not criticizing the band for sounding like themselves, I'm criticizing them for not switching it up enough. I honestly can't tell the difference between these two songs.

Spineless

I like this track. It feels a lot more melodic than the last couple of tracks. The licks have a weird upbeat rhythm to them that contrasts with the heavy vocals. It feels really invocative of early At the Gates. Which is definitely a plus in my book. And I know I've said it before but I love the way Eddie harmonizes with the gang vocals towards the end. I'm a sucker for harmony.

The Past Will Haunt Us Both

Well, I spoke too soon on this album. This song is amazing. This song exhibits that distinct All Shall Perish sound from the last two albums. The distinct guitar tone. The somber lyrics and sad-sounding yet angry vocals. Jesus Christ, these guys can blow it out of the water when they want to.

Royalty Into Exile

Damn. This is hands down one of their best songs. Everything is on point. Eddie's switching it up from screaming to growling to shrieking to growling. The chugging and drumming are relentless. The breakdown is fucking brutal. This is a good ass song. I even found myself headbanging and turning up the volume on this one. Something I don't think I've pointed out yet is how the guitarist will riff in the background and it will sound just distinctive enough from the rest of the song to stick out but melodic enough not to sound out of place. It's almost like he came in afterward and jammed to the song instead of actually laying everything down with the rest of the guys. I've noticed that on a good bit of their songs.

My Retaliation

This is by far the angriest song on the record. The track opens with Eddie screaming "I hope to see you fucking die!" So you already know you're in for a ride from the first few seconds. To put it into perspective, this song sounds a lot like Hatebreed. It's motherfucking angry. Eddie talks during the breakdown. He's screaming at the top of his lungs. I don't know if I prefer the cringe-worthy political lyrics or if I'm more of a fan of these angry Taylor Swift ballads. It's definitely pretty funny to picture Eddie writing these songs.

"That bitch said she'd come to the tour bus, but now she's kissing some scene kid. I'm going to write a song about this."

Rebirth

This song really highlights the range that this band has. Eddie went from screaming pretty coherently in the intro to shrieking pretty quickly. That takes a shitton of control. And I know I was complaining just three songs ago. I know I've complimented Eddie thirty times. But how many vocalists do you know of that will scream in so many different styles? And all in one song, on top of that? We've looked at albums where the vocalist sang in just one voice the entire time. This fucker screamed in four distinct styles in just five minutes. I can 100% see why Eddie was chosen as the successor for Mitch Luker in Suicide Silence.

The Death Plague

I don't really like the instrumentation on this one but once again Eddie is going insane with his vocals. At one point he starts damn near pig squealing. Towards the end, he starts yelling. If there's a Man of a Thousand Screams it's Eddie Hermida. This motherfucker can sound like five other bands. It makes 100% sense why they made him fuck off All Shall Perish until he was successful with Suicide Silence. All Shall Perish would've wound up blowing Suicide out of the fucking water. Imagine if Eddie had done another All Shall Perish record after You Can't Stop Me. I guarantee Suicide Silence probably would've faded off.

In This Life of Pain

That piano part was beautiful. I can't figure out which of the members played it. The song after it is okay. It's the only song on the record that features any sort of clean singing. And I find it hilarious that those few words are "You fucking disgust me." That's very All Shall Perish.

Nobleza En Exilo

My version features the Spanish language version of Royalty in Exile. And it really highlights how fucking good that song is. Because of course it doesn't rhyme anymore and some of the verses don't fit where they're supposed to. And it still sounds pretty decent. I can't take it seriously though. I think this is what you have to sing to summon whatever demon provides Taco Bell with their food. I respect Eddie for repping his country though.

Surprise! You're Dead!

It takes some big balls to cover Faith No More. It takes even bigger talent to cover them and damn near make a better song than the original. And be honest. If you didn't know Faith No More (Hell, maybe you don't. Welcome to life, brother.) There ain't many people that could do that laugh and not sound like a complete crackhead. If there ain't a single other song on this album that you liked, then you gotta commend it for having this bomb-ass cover. Take notes Five Finger Death Punch.

What Do I Think?

All Shall Perish is a good fucking band hands down. I'm most certainly going to check out their record Awaken the Dreamers. I'm pretty sure it will show the transition that happened between their second album and this one. Because this album is tons better.

But all in all, I fuck with this band. They have a message. They have a distinctive sound. They have an insanely talented frontman in Eddie Hermida. I honestly can't wait for his stint with Suicide Silence to take a little pause so this band can resume making music.

What's Next?

It seems like these song reviews were the only thing holding the world together. I stopped writing them in January, and then a deadly Chinese virus popped up out of nowhere. I took another break in March and shit has been going downhill ever since. So, I'm bringing the reviews back. Y'all don't have to worry about pandemics and riots over dead pornstars any more. I'll be your vaccine. I'll be your porn star.

Next time I'm around these parts we'll be taking a look at -

Holy shit!

Next time. We'll be taking a look at my favorite band, All That Remains! And that's going to be a seven parter! Strap your asses in for an onslaught of the (second) best metalcore band on this Earth!

Peace out. And don't burn your city down.

All That Remains Picture © 2019 Whatever That Watermark in the Corner Says; Just Don't Sue Me
Eddie Hermida Picture © 2014 MetalsPeak
George Floyd Pictures © 2017 The Habib Show
Looted Jimmy John's Picture © 2020 Dakota Piecinsky

Monday, March 30, 2020

Alphabetically Reviewing My Music Collection Week 14: All Shall Perish Part 1

That's right I'm fucking back. What the fuck happened to the world? One fucking pandemic and they shut EVERYTHING down? Wowee, this is insane. What happened to the good ol' days of the Black Plague when we would nonchalantly spread that shit to each other like it was candy? Nowadays, that'll get you fifteen to twenty... (I wish I was joking.)

"Oh shit, he's got a cough! Grab the stun gun!"

Anyways we left off with one of the laziest bands of all time. I thought I liked them but having to analyze their songs made me realize how fucking lazy they were. We're doing none of that shit today. Cause we're tackling OG Deathcore pioneers ALL SHALL PERISH!

Hell yeah. These guys are the fucking Black Sabbath of Deathcore. All the repetitive, one-and-done shit that every other so-called Deathcore band on Bandcamp is doing now, these guys were doing it first and best. I'm talking insane blast beats. Multiple vocal styles. Riffing that will smack your jaw onto the floor. Breakdowns that will make your heart stop. Piano solos and weird movie samples. All Shall Perish were some of the first to do it.

I may sound like my mouth is full of dick but I'm honestly excited to be doing this. So let's hop right the fuck into it!

This week we're going to be looking at The Price of Existence and next week we'll tackle This Is Where It Ends.

Eradication

Damn. What the hell do I say? I told you this wasn't your nephew's deathcore. Just 40 seconds and and we've already heard screeching, growling and gang vocals. Eddie Hermida screams like a monster. The axeman is playing the perfect melody to accompany this demon of a track. This song feels filthy going into my ears. The guitars have a really crispy tone to them. And the relentless chugging feels somewhat at home here. I still don't know how to describe how I just heard. It was distilled brutality.

Wage Slaves

In case the song titles and the album cover (Or Eddie screaming "Oppression!" eighty times in the last song.) didn't give it away this album is woke as fuck. Almost to the point where the lyrics are sort of edgy.

I guess that's one thing about Deathcore that didn't eventually get better...

Although I don't 100% agree with the message the social commentary doesn't bother me. I'd rather have lyrics about society than about cutting someone to pieces. [cough] Cannibal Corpse [cough].

Just a heads up if you speak pig squeal and don't want to listen to 90 minutes of Bush-era political commentary. Cause that's what you could sum this album up as.

The song is decent. This is one of those cases where everything is so on point I can't really say much.

I like how Eddie screams along with the gang vocals. I don't think I've heard anyone do that before. I thought it was weird that the breakdown was so slow, but I imagine you don't really want your audience moshing to a song about wage inequality. That's kind of a bad look.

The Day of Justice

This track really picks up the tempo from Wage Slaves. The guitar work is on point. Especially towards the end when Eddie starts shrieking. The solo felt a bit lackluster but it was definitely there and neither you and I can play it. I also like the way this one slows down and speeds up until it gets to the end. And then you get the trademark chugging and blast beats.

There Is No Business To Be Done on A Done on a Dead Planet

This song features a guy from the band Red Chord (you know I had to stop and check them out.) These guys were doing what The Black Dahlia Murder does today, way back in 2006. I'm talking crazy guitar riffs, weird synths, and the whole nine. And then they became watered down experimental grindcore.

I don't know what the Red Grindchord guy does on this track, (Metallum says he plays guitars on this track, so that's what I'll assume. I honestly don't hear much of a difference.) Their music is pretty woke too, and given the song title, I think it's safe to assume he ghostwrote the song.

Don't get me wrong, though. The song is still pretty brutal. It immediately kicks off with pig-squealing and the guitarist shreds the whole time.

Better Living Through Catastrophe

Oh, hell yeah, this is the All Shall Perish I know. That somber guitar riff getting cut off with a pained "Fuck everything!" No one else sounds like that. The snares sound like gunshots, the bass pounds hard as fuck. And then everything ends with that epic guitar solo. This is definitely the best track off the album so far. It feels way more angry in a regretful way, than angry in an edgy "Fuck you!" way. This one is definitely a stand-out track.

Prisoner of War

Damn. Talk about changing it the fuck up. This doesn't even sound like it came off the same album. The guitarists are riffing faster. Eddie is screaming harder. That spoken interlude caught me way off guard. I wasn't expecting anything like that. And then they take a complete left turn. This one is just different.

I can definitely see a kid listening to this in his garage back in 2006 and wanting to make music like this.

Greyson

This is a short instrumental track. It's very somberly played on a classical guitar. I got lost in thought listening to it. In case you're wondering 'Greyson' is the guitarist's son. He had just been born when they were recording the album.

We Hold These Truths...

Goddammit, these songs are getting more #woke by the minute. And the wokest ones are slapping the hardest. And honestly, I should have said this at the top, but I don't endorse anything they say in this song or any of the other songs on the album. Whether I agree or not is another topic for another blog. (That you can read right here. Heh heh. )

Either way, this shit slaps. Eddie is screaming his heart out. The drummer is pounding the fuck out of the drums. The guitars are just riffing and chugging. And we get the best breakdown of the album. The guitarist jams while Eddie shrieks like a fucking harpy and the drummer blasts off to space. It's insanity. You can fucking hear that this song comes from a place these guys resonate with 100%.

The True Beast

This one once again opens up with a demonic scream from Eddie. The riffing and the drumming compliment his helpless yelping and shrieking. The breakdown puts Eddie's voice through a phaser and he sounds like an evil radio announcer. This is the usual fanfare but it's in no way boring or bad.

It seems like this song is about being in a relationship where you're both addicted to a harmful drug and it's tearing you both apart. Hence, "The True Beast."

Promises

This one hits different. It opens up with some amazing axe-handling. Then Eddie starts fucking it up with his screaming and growling. The chugging and pounding make everything sound so brutal. Words can't describe how awesome this sounds. The guitarwork is very clean, and it's pretty easy to understand what Eddie is saying throughout. It makes the track feel more serious, without losing the edge. And goddamn that outro. If I didn't know the song that was coming up, I'd have said that outro was one of the best album endings ever. But it isn't the end of the album. This is...

The Last Relapse

Goddamn.

That piano solo. That intro. The somber rhythm throughout. That classical guitar breakdown. That fadeout during the outro. This one track sums up why these guys are legends. Everyone wanted to sound like this. In fact, there's bands whose whole gimmick is sounding like this one song. It's the perfect blend of angry and tortured wrapped up in one song. Words don't do this justice. Only sound waves do.

Final Verdict

Looking through the lens of today, it's easy to say that this sounds like any generic deathcore album off of Bandcamp. But taking into consideration that this was made in 2006, this album blows me the fuck away. The production is solid throughout. The simple fact that you could easily mistake this album as being way younger than it is, goes to show how ahead of its time it was. Songs like "Promises" and "The Last Relapse" easily get stuck in your head. However, I will admit most of these songs aren't very fun to listen to, and most sound the same. Reading the lyrics as you listen makes it more fun, but I shouldn't have to do that. This album has had some of my favorite songs I've reviewed, but it's been one of the hardest to get through.

Next week we tackle All Shall Perish's 2011 record This Is Where It Ends.

And I guarantee you guys are going to love that shit.

See ya next week!

Friday, January 17, 2020

A Very Brief Hiatus

Hey, hey hey.

This week I restarted taking college classes. And honestly, I want to buckle down and focus on the five classes that I have. If you've ever read the very first posts on the sidebar you'll know that this blog was born during my first semester of college. So what gives? What the hell is the difference this semester?

I may have bet someone I was going to ace all of my courses this semester. There may or may not be a large sum of money on the line. And I'll be honest, I'm a simple guy. I wake up in the morning with a finite amount of fucks to give. I can't be spending thirty hours every week writing and editing if I want to also knock out thirty hours of studying. As you can tell math

It hurts the hell out of me to take any kind of time off. (I used to write on here every single day.) but I think that's the best decision right now.

I won't be gone long. And I'll drop in from time to time.

Besides, I owe you guys a song review.

Or maybe 400, but y'all get the point...

Sunday, January 12, 2020

Alphabetically Reviewing My Music Collection Week 13: All Hail the Yeti Part 2

Well, well, well.

Look who came crawling back to Joe's Not Diary to finish up the review series on All Hail the Yeti?

I knew you'd be back. I didn't know if I'd be back. After two straight weeks of this shit, I can tell you one thing for sure.

I'm fucking tired of listening to All Hail the Yeti. Let's get this over with.

This week we're reviewing their self-titled album. So yeah, let's get to it.

Deep Creek

Ooh, this one is already off to a way better start than the last one. The vocals are just nasty. Connor Garrity (Can I stop saying 'the vocalist', now? It's been two weeks. I know the whole lineup by name.) sounds like a hobgoblin every time he shrieks out those lyrics.

Speaking of, Deep Creek is about a ten-foot-tall swamp monster. At this point, I don't know if it's a real legend or AHTY made it up. Which is exactly what I would expect from a band named "All Hail the YETI." Not songs about Jonestown and hating scene kids.

This is an earworm and my description cannot possibly do the song justice. Give it a listen.

When the Sky Falls

This song is badass. There's no gap between the beginning of this track and the end of the first one. It immediately kicks off with rapid speaking from Connor that morphs into pained shrieking and beautiful singing. I don't know what happened between this record and the last but Connor sounds so much different. His screams sound nasty. And we get to hear all the different shades of his voice throughout this song.

From what I can tell (I didn't fucking write it, so I'm not 100%) this song is about Satan influencing another Angel to follow him before being cast out of Heaven. Good stuff, so far.

Suicide Woods

Y'all remember a couple years ago when Logan Paul was in hot water for going to the Japanese Suicide Woods, cracking inappropriate jokes, and showing dead bodies on YouTube? This song and video are about the same Suicide Woods.

With 100% fewer career-derailing jokes

and punchable faces.

This is an okay song. The simplistic guitar riffing and the lack of a solo make it seem more reminiscent of Southern rock. Someone in the comments of the YouTube video said that this song has Nickelback level guitar playing. That's about right. The spoken parts feel like they're pulled right out of a Mushroomhead song. (Which just makes me want to go listen to Mushroomhead.)

I don't know what the fuck the song is about because half of these songs don't have their lyrics posted anywhere and I'm definitely not going to be the one to transcribe them. My money is on it being about someone killing themselves, though.

The Art of Mourning

Now, they went all out on this one. This is one of their best songs. When I think All Hail the Yeti, 'The Art of Mourning' is one of the first things that pops into my head. This song is damn near as perfect as those balls Tom Brady deflated.

This track opens up with a unique rendition of 'O, Death.' And then you hear one of the most metal harmonica solos ever. (What're there like five in existence, tops?) All while the bass and the drums pound.

The refrain of this song always gets stuck in my head. Connor's horrid screaming layered under his sweet singing just makes that last one so much more memorable.

And unlike the last few songs, I can definitely tell you the story of this one. Back in the Old West, a soon retiring killer for hire finds his family assassinated. So he hunts down the motherfuckers that did it and brutally kills each of them. It's basically an Old West version of Old Man Logan with a little bit of Punisher mixed in. I also like the way the song repeatedly asks, "This is justice, but what does it prove?" It's as if it doesn't want you to feel good about the poor guy getting his revenge.

The Weak and Wounded

So this one is more of a prelude to the following track. It's a creepy interview session between a doctor and a possessed patient. The whole thing reeks of creepiness and claustrophobia. And it segues right into the next track.

After the Great Fire

I don't know if it's the choir of children, how tortured Connor's screaming sounds, or the groovy chugging during the verses but this track is just perfect. The solo just seems neverending. The samples tie in just enough for the lyrics to keep you satisfied but still wondering. The harmony on every "After the Great Fire!" gives the line 300% more impact and melody. And I also think it's awesome towards the end when Connor starts chanting "I am the devil, I am the smoke!"

For context, this song (and all of the samples) is based on a psych horror movie called Session 9. I've personally never gotten around to watching it but everyone that has says it's amazing. And All Hail the Yeti liked it so much they wrote a song about it.

It's a good listen.

Bloodguilt

This is another amazing track. The drummer kicks it off perfectly. The vocals are on point from the very beginning. There's a very interesting guitar lick during each pre-chorus. In fact, the guitar work is completely on point here. Especially during that breakdown. My favorite part of this song, and possibly the entire album is the way they scream the name of the song over the last few seconds of the song.

All it takes is one listen to know what this track is about; a nappy-headed ho that left my man Connor for some other bro. Snoop Dogg would certainly approve of the thrashing this song gives her. Fuck her.

I Am Wendigod

It honestly feels a little weird that we live in a world where no one thinks I'm a weirdo for knowing what a wendigo is. (Thanks Until Dawn.)

This song encourages the listener to feast on that tasty human flesh and blood and become a fucking Wendigo. Why? Because the fucking Wendigod says so. (Once again, this is exactly the kind of track I'd expect and want from a band called All Hail the YETI)

This track really ain't nothing special instrumentally. There's a short spoken introduction that's in some kind of native tongue.

To be honest, this song feels like it was made specifically for an AMV.

I guarantee you that isn't necessarily a bad thing.

Axe Murder Hollow

I swear that these guys have Zakk Wylde ghost-guitaring on some of these tracks.

This was definitely the fucking heaviest track so far. Nonstop screaming on top of endless chugging and abusive drumming. I don't know what the fuck "Axe Murder Hollow" is but it's definitely the perfect name for this song.

I wasn't too much a fan of that whole minute of feedback noises in the beginning though. This isn't Metal Machine Music. Guitar feedback is not ambiance, it's just guitar feedback.

Ruby Ridge (Every Knee Shall Bow)

Ah, the early 90's gun control crises.

For those of y'all who don't know, Ruby Ridge was an 11-day standoff between gun enthusiast, (and alleged white separatist) Randy Weaver, the F.B.I. and the U.S. Marshalls. It left Weaver's son, wife, and dog dead, and a community of fellow gun enthusiasts pissed the fuck off. The OKC bomber even cited it as one of the incidents he was seeking revenge for. Looking through the lens of today, it honestly probably could've been handled better.

But we did get this dope-ass song out of it.

This song sounds pretty good. It's got the usual groovy riffing, screaming, and singing. The big difference here is that the lyrics are really telling a story this time. Connor sounds uniquely pissed off.

Judas Cradle

This may possibly be the best song on the album. This is the only track on the album (or that I've ever heard from AHTY) that actually sounds upbeat during the chorus. I love how fucking tortured Connor sounds at the end of the song. The track fades out with incoherent screaming, riffing, and gang vocalizing.

I know I say this a lot but that's definitely fitting, given the title of the song. The Judas Cradle was a medieval torture device that consisted of a huge erected pyramid whose tip was inserted into the victim's business end. And then they forcefully lowered you down onto it.

You can picture the rest.

This is a very different track instrumentally. And I dig it. This was the perfect way to end the album.

Or at least it would have been.

This song has fifteen minutes of swamp ambiance tacked onto the end of it. And after actually listening to it for a few minutes, instead of fifteen minutes of genuine ambiance, it seems more like fifteen minutes of the same twenty-second loop of crickets, birds, water, and frogs. Which sucks, because I actually felt awesome for the first minute and a half. It gave the illusion that I had been listening to some kind of exotic concert in a swamp and now that their performance was over, the band was sailing away on some wooden raft. But about three minutes in, it feels like you're just sitting there listening to royalty-free nature sounds. Which is exactly what the fuck you're doing.

And guess what happens after those fifteen minutes?

No, seriously guess!

If you guessed literally anything, then congratulations on knowing how to end a record better than All Hail the Yeti. Because the correct answer is "fucking nothing. "

I'm so done with this band, right now.

Final Verdict / What Do I Think?

I don't know what the fuck happened on the album I listened to last week. This record was awesome. All Hail the Yeti is basically Pantera with more violent screaming and tad bit less groove. And I can dig that. I've listened to some more of their recent stuff and they have broken that repetitive mold on Screams From a Black Wilderness. And I mean broke it.

My biggest issue with the band is their lyrics. Even when it seems like they're saying something deep, if you read along to the song, 75% of the time it's either completely nonsensical or simplistic.

I know I'm railing on them, but I've been listening to this band since my first few days of High School. I'm definitely going to keep listening to them. Just no time soon.

Join us next time when we tackle Deathcore behemoths All Shall Perish!

Monday, January 6, 2020

Alphabetically Reviewing My Music Collection Week 12: All Hail the Yeti Part 1

Happy New Year and welcome to Season Two of the best way to spend your Sunday. (Yes, I know it's Monday.) We're starting the year off right with one of the best bands I can think of All Hail The Yeti! AHTY were one of the first metalcore bands I started listening to and they pushed me through highschool. I can't count the amount of times I would drown out the awkwardness of being an adolescent with Screams From a Black Wilderness.

And since that's the album I'm the most familiar with, that's the one we'll be tackling this week. You see, going forward, a lot of the bands we're tackling will have 100s of songs. Instead of reviewing them all in one day, I'm going to split them up by album.

Before the Flames

Let's hop right into it. Something that sets All Hail the Yeti apart from any other band is that most of their songs tell a story or are references to pop culture. Before the Flames is no different.

The intro is wonderful. From the calm strumming to the crazy riffing to the expectant chugging of the pre-chorus. All accompanied by the unpolished screams of the vocalist. Then the cleans of the chorus that proclaim "We serve a lesser god!"

Although, I've got used to it over the years that post-breakdown, "Oh my God! What is happening?!?", is one of the funniest lines I've heard in a song. If you're not paying attention to the lyrics it's jarring as hell. Also, the melody with the screaming and singing towards the end is beautiful.

Plague Dance

Did you know that there was a plague that made a whole village spasm uncontrollably for three days straight? A literal plague dance. Unfortunately, that's not the plague this song is about but that's still metal AF. Here 'plague dance' refers to a ritual done to mourn for all of those killed by the plague. Which is still pretty metal. I also find the fact that the song kicks off with a Monty Python reference is hilarious.

Let the Night Roar

This song is about the Jonestown massacre. The title is a reference to the final sermon given before the sermon and a sample of it ends the breakdown. That breakdown kicks off with some amazing cleans and drumming. It sounds amazing.

Given the subject matter, the song repeatedly beckons you to 'smile and drink.' I don't have to go into detail about what that means. If you read along with the lyrics, the words of Jim Jones are screamed, while his followers' responses are sung. Something about that is morbidly fitting.

Mr. Murder

You may be thinking this is about the Stephen King book.

Ew, no.

This song is a tribute to the lead singer's best friend who passed away during the recording of this album. Metalcore legend Brock Lindow is featured, as he was also good friends with Mr. Murder. (I couldn't find anything on why they named the song that. Dude's name was Matt.) This is essentially All Hail the Yeti's 'Wish You Were Here.'

You can feel the emotion on this track as the vocalist is screaming way harder than usual. There are some references in the lyrics that are pretty personal. You can honestly tell these guys were genuinely best friends. Matt meant a lot to them. And the song hits home. Because we all have a friend like that, we never want to lose.

Lady of the Night

Groovy ass intro. Heavy ass screaming with a distortion effect for good measure. And then comes the chorus and it completely contrasts that. I love how the cleans and screams are layered during the chorus.

The bass is really prominent throughout. The guitar riffing feels really funky during the breakdown. Those last few riffs of the song accompanied by the 'Kill me! Lady of the night!' is the most badass thing of this album.

Witch is Dead

Y'all remember that scene in the OG Wizard of Oz when Dorothy first shows up in Oz and her trailer lands right on top of the Wicked Witch of the East? Did you know that All Hail That Yeti composed the 'Witch is Dead' jingle that the munchkins sing in that scene?

If you look closely you can see the vocalist making sure the actors get the words right.

Nah this one is about dumping (and possibly murdering) a chick who caused you a lot of pain. That ex that cheated on you with your best bro and then cheated on him with his uncle? This is a 'fuck you' to her. All Hail the Yeti are experts at writing relationship songs.

Instrumentally, this track is standard fare. Everything is on point. The good cop bad cop vocals hammer home the point of the chorus. There's some expert rhyming in the verses. The solo is brief but groovy. This one is a little bit more catchy and upbeat than usual. After all, it is based on a Wizard of Oz reference.

Daughter of the Morning Star

This one starts off pretty slow but it picks up the pace with the first chorus. And then the breakdown is straight insanity. But you already knew what you were in for with that title.

I want to say that this song is about a native witch killing some Christian settlers that disturb her home. The opening line of the song is "It was 1493" which is the year Columbus first docked in America.

Sun Will Never Set

These bros started sounding like Pantera, Mastodon, and something entirely unique all at the same time. The guitar tone is dirty and evokes Southern Metal. That distorted spoken interlude
The harmony between the vocalist and the bassist on top of the riffing sounds amazing. This track stands out. If anything makes me call All Hail the Yeti Southern Rock this song is it.

Which is hilarious, given that this is a song rejecting faith and the superficial for belief in what can be seen. Not a very Southern message if you ask me.

Fall of Core

There's nothing particularly interesting about the instruments here. But the lyrics are kind fo cringeworthy. This song is exactly what it says on the tin. It's a fuck you to (what All Hail the Yeti calls) posers and hipsters. This is the first time I've heard someone scream 'skinny jeans' and I never want to hear it again.

I hate scenies and posers as much as the next guy but I think it's a waste of time to dedicate a whole song to that. In fact, that makes you look like a grumpy elitist. Also, I don't think All Hail the Yeti are exactly the right folks to be calling out skinny jeans-wearing hipsters...

Maybe they're making an attempt at self-deprecation...

But if you hate posers so much that you feel like they're ruining your livelihood, then I guess it makes sense to write about it. To each his own.

Breaking the Wheel

This one isn't too different. The chorus is pretty catchy. And honestly I think that's the best thing about all of these tracks. At the very least the choruses are all pretty memorable. This is one of the few that will probably have you singing along.

The song is about indulgence and substance abuse. And not to get all general here but I'm going to have to take back what I said earlier. Most of these songs have lyrics that are either weird, or inconsistent throughout. It also doesn't help that some of the vocals are so incoherent that the words couldn't be transcribed. Honestly I hate to say this, but this song really highlights the fact that All Hail the Yeti don't have the best lyrics.

Nemesis Queen

This is the grooviest track of the record. This song is so groovy it sounds like Black Label Society with All Hail the Yeti's vocalist.

There's the constant riffing. The crooning cleans. The harsh vocals to contrast. And another catchy-ass chorus. And the guitarist unleashed his inner Zakk Wylde for that solo.

Angels Envy

Jesus Christ, I guess All Hail the Yeti is a metal band. This one starts off with a spoken and sang part and transitions into some hectic shredding and screaming. And then they repeat this for the next few minutes. Singing/ speaking and then a chaotic refrain. Then we get to the breakdown and it becomes 100% screaming. And I mean screaming. The vocals go up to 11 on the harshness. And then the track and the album end.

Wowee. That was a helluva track to end on.

Final Verdict / What Do I Think?

I already introduced AHTY as one of my favorite bands. I've been listening to them for years and that probably isn't going to change. That said, I really want to save my greater opinions on the band for next week.

As for this album, I've heard better. And I've certainly heard worse. It's consistent throughout. It doesn't suddenly switch genres in the middle of the record. (Oh, it happens. Just wait for All That Remains.) The production is pretty well-rounded. All of these songs, at the very least, have a catchy chorus. That's what keeps me listening to this band. Their songs get stuck in your head.

And honestly, it's so formulaic it kind of gets boring. Most of these songs follow a very specific structure. After a while, all of the songs meld together in my head and I can't tell them apart. To be honest, it sort of feels like I just listened to the same song 12 times in a row. Except it was slightly different every time.

I can't forgive that piss poor songwriting though. That's a musical sin.

Unfortunately, I'm starting not to like this band as much. However, we do have next week to take a look at their first self-titled album and a couple of other tracks. And I think that may shift my opinion back in the other way.

So come back next week for that. Or don't. I don't care.