The Book of Five Rings Summary

Well, this was a very enjoyable read. I'll admit that I've never read anything quite like this book in my life. Let's delve into it.

Who was Miyamoto Musashi?

Miyamoto Musashi is a complicated figure. He's widely regarded as one of the most vicious and successful warriors in history. He was a samurai, philosopher, teacher, artist and writer. As a samurai he won 61 duels. As a teacher he founded the discipline of Niten Ichi-ryū (The Way of Two Swords or more directly "The art of two Heavens as one"). After his life of dueling and teaching was over he retired to a cave and published his book on strategy, tactics and life called the Book of Five Rings. And on his deathbed he also penned Dokkōdō which was a list of 21 rules that Musashi believed samurai should follow. Musashi trained to be a swordsman from his childhood and roamed fuedal Japan dueling and killing until he got very good at it.  

Later in his life, Musashi was plagued with poor health, but he didn't want his way of life to die with him. So he started taking notes of the strategies he followed and the tactics he'd cultivated. This was first recorded as 31 Ways of Strategy and as the years passed Musashi retired to a cave and penned the Book of Five Rings, his final book on combat tactics and strategy. 

Musashi lived in a time of violence and lawlessness in Japan. Military warlords had seized control of the country and continued to fight, be assassinated and conquer other areas by force. During the bulk of Musashi's life Japan would have been in political and religious turmoil as the country shifted and changed rapidly. Musashi himself served in various military campaigns, likely in the service of shaping the country in the age of its new rulers. Rampant violence, impromptu rebellions, frequent wars and a newfound state-sponsored appreciation for arts and crafts were the backdrop of Musashi's life. It is a man who grew up and prospered during these times that published the Book of Five Rings. 

Now, despite being published in 1645, the book was not widely read or enjoyed by the world at large until the life and exploits of Musashi were serialized in a radio show in the 1950s. Musashi was essentially imortalized as a legendary and ruthless warrior from the past, and The Book of Five Rings became heralded as a sacred text. In modern times, Joe Rogan, Jiri Prochaschza, and a wealth of Japanese businesses have implemented the teachings from the book to excel in their lives and occupations.

The book is a comletely no-nonsense instruction manual and guide to Musashi's philosophy and practice of Niten Ichi-ryū. The book outlines specific strategies for combat with two swords, stances and mindsets, along with Musashi's general beliefs and opinions on how to succeed in war and martial arts. However, it must be emphasized that Musashi's strategy emphasizes being succesful at everything that you do, no matter what it is. He repeatedly says that he was perfect in practicing every aspect of his life, from painting, to building and to fighting and war. The way of strategy according to Musashi relies upon nine principles and is broken down in to five books (which the titular "rings" are a reference to). The nine principles that Musashis endorses in every day life are -

1. To not think dishonestly.

2.  To train and practice all the time.

3.  To become familiar with all differnt kinds of arts 

4. To become familiar with how to suceed in all different kinds of professions.

5. To be able to tell whether you're gaining or losing in everything you do.

6.  To be able to perceive things that cannot be seen.

7.  To develop intuition and sound reasoning. 

8. To pay attention even to small things.

9. To never do anything which has no purpose.

The text is divided into five books (or scrolls), which are the book of the ground, the book of water, the book of fire, the book of wind, and the book of the void. 

The Book of the Ground 

Now, the book of the ground (or the earth in some translations) emphasizes the small and inportant details of strategy that have to be understood and built upon to succeed. This book is called the book of the ground because it is essentially outlining the foundational ground of Musashi's strategy.

Most of this particular book talks specifically about how to hold your swords, why you hold your swords this way, and why you do not use different weapons other than swords. 

The Book of Water

It's imperative to always remember who Musashi was while reading this book. He was not an actor, or a LARPer and he didn't do what he did for sport. Miyamoto Musashi was the historical equivalent of a Chris Kyle or a real-life analogue to someone like Wolverine. It's easy to romanticize him from an abstract standpoint, but ultimately this man was a warrior. And the bigger idea, which gets repeated every other paragraph in this book, is that the one and only purpose of being a warrior is to end the life of other people who are simultaneously trying to end your life. If you do not keep this in your head while reading, you'll be very uncomfortable. The text is written in an instructional tone and Musashi tells you, the reader, exactly how to do what he's describing. If you're not comfortable with being graphically informed on how to cut someone down with a sword, then you should probably skip this book. 

Moving onward, the principal of the book of water is to be free-flowing and adaptable in your combat, taking the shape of each situation, like water. 

This part hammers home that if you're determined to become a warrior you have to read, reread, think about and practice everything in this section. If you are a warrior, you are a warrior. If you are not then you are not. Do not try to appear to be something that you are not.

This section gives you some pointers on how to stand, how to hold your sword, and how to view and think about combat situations (i.e. people that are bigger than you, being outnumbered, never brandishing weapons to scare people.)

The Book of Fire

This scroll gives you specific strategies to be used in combat. The scroll is named this way because in combat, your strategies have to be like fire, hot to the touch and destructive, but ultimately formless and able to grow. Most of this book is composed of very specific tactics and strategies to be used in large scale and one on one combat. I will outline a few of my favorites and then we'll move to the next scroll.

The Book of the Wind

This book is like a disstrack towards other sword combat schools or Musashi's time. Here Musashi talks about why other schools that use different kinds of styles (one sword, extra long swords, short swords) are inferior to his style. In general, he talks about how being flashy or relying on tactics that are for flair serve no purpose and will get you killed in combat. Think of strange martial arts schools that have extra flashy belts that require little effort to gain or movements that serve no purpose in combat. The overarching theme of this scroll is that there is only one way to kill someone with a sword. If you decide to dance before you do it, wear purple camouflage or use a huge sword, you still have to cut them down. So what is the point of adding a bunch of unnecessary steps to the process?

I say that it is a disstrack, but Musashi says that everyone has their style for a reason and trying to argue with someone about their style is bad. He says to have respect for the methods of others and to at least understand why they do what they do instead of being completely dismissive. But the emphasis is that his way is still the best way and the right way.

The Book of the Void

This is a short section that sort of sums up the underlying theme of the entire book. The void is a concept that you can think of as the subconscious or as nothingness. The void is the state where everything is but it also isn't. The big idea is that if you achieve mastery of something you'll be able to do it in any state, at any time, without thinking. And the goal of this book is to get you to master your practice until you can reach a state where you are proficient even in the void. The void is basically the state of flow where you'be achieved mastery to the point of not needing to consciously choose every act. It's kind of abstract in concept. The void is basically the place where every level of higher understanding meets and flows together. 

Key principles and lessons conveyed

Each scroll sort of has an overarching theme or lesson. The ground book is supposed to be the foundation of the art, teaching the basics. The water book outline tactics that can be used any and everywhere but have to be adapted and changed to each situation, just like water. The fire book teaches the nature of fighting and what it is and isn't and emphasizes that it is like a raging fire. The wind scroll emphasizes the less tangible parts of strategy that other schools and disciplined miss out on. And the book of the void emphasizes mastery of everything.

The big idea of the text as a whole, is that the only way to become perfect at one thing is to pursue every little aspect of it to perfection and to also learn about and appreciate other things and apply that knowledge to this. A thousand days for practice and a thousand days for application. The one quote that sums up this philosophy is "Fixation is the way to death, and fluidity is the way to everything." The only way to succeed at something is to always be open to learning more about and then applying what you've learned to the way you practice it.

Reflection on the Modern Impact and Popularity of the Book

Now look, I'm not some fucking weaboo, so I don't really know too much about the ins and outs of samurai culture. But to my limited understanding there's an emphasis on respect, honor and traditions. This book ain't about none of that and neither was Musashi. He was a ronin, or a samurai with no master. I'm assuming that entailed not giving a flying fuck about respect, honor, and traditions. There's a whole scroll in the book talking about why Musashi's way is better than many other traditional teachings. There's nothing honorable about tactics of "completely crushing your enemies spirit" or "killing wounded enemies." Some of the stuff Musashi teaches would be considered war crimes if directly applied in the modern day. This is a book on the strategy of using the most efficient ways possible to win in combat. It's really got fuck all to do with honor, or respect or traditions.

Now the one and only reason I started  and continued reading it despite being repulsed by its violent content was because through and through its a largely a book about strategical thinking.

The book is an exception guide on military and combat strategy, especially and specifically for sword combat. But the things outlined can be applied to strategy in many, many, many other areas like playing chess, running a business, or even dating.

But here's the thing. The startegies and the book itself are pretty black and white. This is because when you're a rogue samurai that fights to the death constantly, the consequence of failure is dying. Some things aren't as straightforward as cutting down an enemy. Also, it could very likely be the translation, but the book is sort of self-supporting. We do know that Musashi was the most successful swordsman of his time. But what we don't know is whether or not his strategies and tactics would've eventually failed as the world changed around him. He quit while he was ahead.

Some comparisons can be made between this book and Musashi's other text Dokkōdō. However it should be noted that Dokkōdō isn't really a book. It's a scroll that collects 21 precepts that he lived by, recorded by one of his students on his deathbed. It's a good companion piece to this book and it gives you a deeper glimpse into the mindset of the man that wrote this book. 

More broadly, you could compare this book to the arguably more well-known combat strategy text, The Art of War. However, the Art of War more encompasses the ideas and tactics behind being a good leader of soldiers and general whereas the Book of Five Rings is more or less about individual combat strategies and doesn't touch on leadership. Nonetheless the two books can go hand-in-hand and make good companion pieces to each other.

I'm sure if you've gotten this far into this review, you've probably seen Joe Rogan gushing about this book. (In fact, he even has a tattoo of Miyamoto Musashi). This book is inherently about the strategy of winning in combat so it can be applied to many and any situation where there has to be a victor. More obviously, there is a few very popular professional fighter who uses this book to guide his life. And there are a few Kendo schools that exclusively teach and practice Musashi's version of swordmaship for competition. Yours truly used the strategies in the book to get better at chess, conversation, and studying. You see, at its core this book espouses striving towards excellence in your craft whatever that is. And that's done by continuous learning and improvement and fearless adaptation. The general idea of the strategy can be applied to anything. Lay a good and solid foundation, learn the basics, practice and perform endlessly and always improve. That's the Way. One of the most well-known quotes from this book is "If you know the way broadly, you will see it in all things."

If you search for recommendations for books on startegy, or combat, or war, this book will probably be one of the first to pop up. Miyamoto Musashi is a beloved figure in Japanese culture and he's been immortalized in radio serials, animated movies and television shows. And this book is largely the reasoning behind him being so well-remembered. 

The line "fixation is the way to death" had a profound impact on me. If you don't make a concerted effort to continue practicing and learning and changing then you will eventually begin to fail and fall behind in your discipline. Not every situation calls for the exact same actions. There are also many points in the book where Musashi emphasizes to think only of the purpose of actions and to use things for their intended purposes. This was something that I had to contemplate deeply in my own life. It helped me to always remember to think about the point of what I was doing before, during and after my actions.

There are a lot of us who like to play strategy games, and those of us that like to smack each other around inside of steel cages. There are also some of us out here legitimately wearing armor and swordfighting in warehouses. To each his own. This book is useful for anyone doing things like that. And to anyone on a "manly war book" trip maybe spurred on by Robert Greene, or your local Men's book club this is the manly war book. It's shorter and more to the point than the Art of War which makes it bit more easily consumable.

Also, though I despise them, there's a lot of weirdos out there that fetishize everything that has to do with Japanese culture. They calm themselves "weeaboos", and the rest of us call them "weird and off-putting."

Final Thoughts 

I'm not going to be a jackass, and say everyone should read this book. In fact, if you don't like violence, don't read this book. The whole subject matter if this book is violence. But people practicing martial arts, sports, or even people in fields like sales or information security could benefit from the strategic mindset this book espouses.

Maybe before reading this book, I'd recommend reading Dokkōdō and also the introduction section of Lawrence Kane and Kris Wilder's long-form analysis of that text. Reading the whole book isn't necessary, but Lawrence and Kris wholly and fully explain the history and background of Musashi as a real historical figure, as a romanticized caricature and as someone who very matter-of-factly ended a lot of people's lives. Understanding who wrote the book and when, and why, can make the text a lot easier to digest and appreciate. Also, it's very easy to forget that "nomadic samurai who won 61 duels" is the same thing as "guy who killed 61 people." It's not uncommon to put this book down on something profound and esoteric and to pick it back up to something unforgivingly violent.

This book provides some definitive viewpoints on strategy and how to win and achieve perfection in many things. But I found that there are many things that do not have winners or losers and in that case the strategies of the book have to be adapted.

Most of the complaints I've read about the book are about not being able to apply it to anything practical. To which I respond with that Bruce Lee quote "Absorb what is useful, discard what is useless and add what is specifically your own." 

This does contradict the book in itself, as Musashi says that his way is the only way and not following it will lead to death. But you have to take into account that Musashi was frequently in life or death situations, so sticking to what worked was especially crucial for him. For those of us that aren't roaming the feudal Japanese countryside getting into sword duels, mistakes are an essential part of the learning process. I'd also like to point out that Musashi says that refusing to compromise is the way to death, and being adaptable is the way to everything. So take of that what you will. He knew that doing the same thing over and over without compromise or adjustments would get him killed. The main emphasis here is that when you stop trying to improve and change and refine things in your discipline, failure comes along as a result.

My Thoughts on Rich Dad, Poor Dad

So I've finally finished Robert Kiyasoki's timeless financial book, Rich Dad, Poor Dad, and it was an amazing read.

The book's main idea is that rich people do certain things and poor and middle-class people do other things. And these things lead poor and middle-class people to be stuck in something called "the rat race." The rat race, according to this book, is unhappily living from paycheck to paycheck and never putting any or enough money away towards savings or retirement. The book makes references to becoming rich and wealthy but Kiyosaki says that being rich and wealthy is simply being able to live comfortably no matter how much you make.

Kiyosaki really hammers home that the only way out of the rat race is to learn more about how to manage your finances. He refers to this principle as financial literacy or financial intelligence. The book in essence a summary of the advice that Robert received from his best friend's business-owning father, the titular Rich Dad, and it juxtaposes that wisdom with the advice he received from his own father, the titular Poor Dad.

Main Ideas

So there are some recurring themes and key concepts that Robert espouses throughout the book. The biggest one is the importance of financial education. The book heavily touts the importance of learning to understand accounting, how to read your income and expenses, knowing how to sell yourself, and figuring out how and when to spend your money. In fact, Robert goes so far as to say the one skill that's keeping a lot of very talented people from escaping the rat race is financial intelligence.

Another key concept is the difference between an asset and a liability. Robert distills the definition of these two things down to assets being things that put money into your pocket and liabilities being things that take money out of your pocket. 

Rich has a very different definition in this book. Rich means generating enough passive income (or income from your assets) to cover all of your expenses. The way to being "rich" is to gather passive income and to keep reinvesting that income into assets that generate it until you can live off it. In fact, Kiyosaki provides some visual aids to illustrate how poor people middle-class people and rich people manage their money.

Robert also talks about the cash flow of the different kinds of earners. These earners are the employee, the self-employed, the business owner, and the investor. In this book, Robert says the only way to get rich is to be a business owner or an investor since people who are self-employed or employees are reliant upon getting their income from actions that others take.

Key Takeaways

There are some things to be taken away from this book. The biggest one for me is to embrace financial education and dedicate yourself to learning about managing money. This entails learning all that you can about how to balance your bank account and coming to understand what you do with your money after you get it. This a book that espouses that knowledge is the greatest form of power and that more you learn the more you can understand. There's a point in the book where Robert says that rich dad told him that what he doesn't know loses him money, and what he does know gains him money. So if he doesn't know something then it shouldn't have any impact on his money.

As mentioned a little bit earlier, Robert really emphasized that the way to becoming wealthy is through acquiring assets that generate passive income. His strategy is to use income from your job to build up the number of assets you have and then to take the surplus money from these assets and then reinvest them into more assets and so on until you can live off your passive income.

We don't have to discuss the realism of the viability of such a financial strategy, but it is indeed simplistic and logically sound.

Robert's Anecdotes

Of course, these lessons don't get imparted just through long bullet-pointed lists and diatribes. There are a number of anecdotes and tales throughout the book that serve to hammer the main concepts home.

Firstly, Robert tells the tale of how he and his friend Mike begged Mike's father to teach them how to be rich like him. And Mike's father's response was to make them work for him at his business for free. This went on for weeks until they both finally got fed up and demanded an explanation. He claimed he wanted to teach them the lesson that if they never spoke up and demanded more out of life, then they'd never get rich. 

Robert also talks about the richest men in the world in the 1920s  (Charles Schwab, Albert Fall, Samuel Insull, Howard Hopson, Ivar Kreuger, Leon Fraser, Richard Whitney, Arthur Cotton Moore, and Jesse Livermore ) and how they had meetings in the mid-twenties. In just a decade, each of them would either go to prison, commit suicide, go insane, or lose all of their money due to the Great Depression. He talks about this to teach the emphasis on being adaptable under different circumstances, environments, and economies. If the richest men in the world were left broken, insane, and penniless by a sudden uprooting of the economy, then it would serve everyone to be able to prepare for and adapt to all kinds of circumstances in this rapidly changing world. 

Another standout tale was the time Robert interviewed Zig Ziglar (who curiously became a notorious financial guru" and motivational speaker) back when he worked for a newspaper. Ziglar wanted to know how he could be a successful author like him. Robert told him that he was a "best-selling" author and not a "best-writing" author and that he needed to learn how to market himself. Ziglar felt like he was belittling him and stormed out of the interview.

However, SOMETHING tells me the book isn't exactly giving all the full details of that story...

Another standout tale is how Robert titled his first book "If You Want to Be Rich and Happy, Then Don't Go To School" because he knew he would get media coverage off the controversial title. His family and friends begged him not to name the book this, but Robert claimed that the inflammatory title would help it sell. And it did.

Robert Kiyosaki: Clickbaiting before it was cool...

In Rich Dad, Poor Dad, Robert Kiyosaki outlines his strategy for becoming rich and wealthy using the timeless ideas and information that he got from his childhood mentor. He emphasizes the importance of learning all that you can, investing in financial education, never succumbing to fear, and building up your asset column with passive income. 

But this post is called "My Thoughts on Rich Dad, Poor Dad." This was some of the best financial advise I've ever been given. It eerily coincides with damn near all of the advice that I've been given by my own father. And I know for certain that he hasn't read this book. 

I love that the book emphasizes to always give before anything else and to distinguish between emotional and logical thinking. 

 

UFC 293: Sean Strickland Outstyled Stylebender

That was fucking beautiful. If you've ever questioned whether styles make fights, then look at this. We all counted Sean out this week, but one thing we at least knew was that with his 20 years of experience, we were going to see some insanely technical shit. And we did. This kind of fight puts the "art" in mixed martial arts. 

I never enjoyed watching Strickland fight. He's very technical. Even more so than Izzy. We dubbed him Sean "Sparring on Fight Night" Strickland before the Imamov card, because he'd talk such a big game in the press conference but fought so calmly and precisely. But it would make sense that someone who's been in the sport since they were 19 would be that way. Experience is the greatest teacher, and fighting technically is the smartest approach. 

At the end of the day, styles make fights, and Sean had the perfect style to counter Izzy's. Volume counterpunching won't work if your counters can't land, and your opponent is doing damage every single time he hits you.  Nonstop fainting and creative kicking aren't going to work if your opponent is constantly pressuring you and making you move backward. A bunch of leg kicks aren't going to work if your opponent is standing straight up and is checking all of them. Sean has crazy defense, heavy hands and always moves forward. Izzy tries to overload you with feints and make you chase him into getting knocked out, and if he can't do that he point fights. One thing that's always been consistent is that Sean makes you stand and swing with him no matter who you are. This isn't going to work against everyone but it definitely worked against Adesanya. The motherfucker outstyled Stylebender.

This is the difference between 20 years of MMA experience vs. 20 years of kickboxing experience. MMA isn't kickboxing. Like we've seen with Anthony Pettis and Edson Barboza, and more recently Rafael Fiziev and Yair Rodriguez, all of your volume striking and flashy kicking don't mean dick if your opponent can make you miss and hits harder than you. Relentless forward pressure combined with smart defense and strong offense will always nullify someone who point fights. Or maybe we're finally starting to see kickboxing and Muay Thai go the way of karate and TKD in the highest level of the sport. 

What's next? Does Izzy fight Dricus in a title contender fight? Does he immediately fight Robert Whittaker? Does DDP skip over Izzy and get the shot?

Either way, Stylebender got his style bent. 

Bigass digression, but I absolutely hate it when people walk out with another country's fight kit on (I was really bothered when Terence McKinney fought a Brazilian in Brazil with Brazilian trunks on and got beat so bad his mouthpiece flew out twice.) I think it's unpatriotic and is a rampant expression of unchecked self-loathing. This "proud Nigerian" fought in his adopted home country of New Zealand with a Chinese fight kit on and got the piss beat out of him. He just disrespected three different countries at once. 

Have some pride in your hometown. It's one of the many things about yourself (like race and hair color) that you simply can't choose...

UFC 290 Predictions - Updated with Post-Fight Thoughts

Let's hop right into my predictions for the main card.

Dan Hooker vs Jalin Turner

Full disclosure, I've only ever seen Jalin Turner lose a decision against Mateusz Gamrot. But I have indeed seen Dan Hooker get his ass beat multiple times (AND I've seen him beat ass as well). Dan Hooker has the experience edge. I'm leaning towards Dan by stoppage or Unanimous decision.

Post-Fight reflection: Yeah, I was on the money with this one. Turner is a former champion and is definitely a damn good lightweight, but Dan Hooker isn't just any other lightweight. 

Alexandre Pantoja vs Brandon Moreno

That flyweight belt isn't real since Henry Cejudo vacated it. Further, this division has some of the fastest paced, yet boring and inconsequential fights. And that's coming from someone who fell in love with Mma off watching Demetrius Johnson tear through ONE FC.

I don't care but I hope Pantoja wins. We all know he won't.

Post-Fight reflection: Well, I guess I was wrong. I really dislike the UFC's flyweight division and the fact that only four dudes have ran through everyone else at that weight, with two of them leaving the division in their primes. Flyweight fights are always fast as hell on the feet and chaotic on the ground. There just doesn't seem to be enough people in the UFC's flyweight division for that to shine. No one with that 125 belt is the real champion until Demetrius Johnson retires and Cejudo drops back down and loses. 

Yair Rodriguez vs. Alexander Volkanowski

 

Yair is another one of those motherfuckers that fights like an Octopus. Volk is a short wrestler who has to close the distance to hit someone. He's not an unsolvable puzzle. And Yair throws strikes I've never seen before. He knocked out Zombie with a fucking weird ass upwards elbow. 

I can definitely see him head kicking Volk as he shoots for a takedown or tries to run out of range. 

However, Volk is heavy. And when I was watching tape I saw Frankie Edgar beat the flying goddamn fuck out of Yair by laying on him and hitting him. 

I'm leaning towards either a second round KO for Yair or a five-round beating that leads to a unanimous decision for Volk. 

Whatever happens, I won't watch another featherweight fight until Topuria gets a title shot.

Post-Fight reflection: I don't know. Volk is a tiny grappler who has to come down the center line to close the distance. A well-placed headkick or uppercut down the middle should at least drop him. Yet, Yair kept throwing side headkicks and switch kicks and kicks everywhere but down the centerline. And Volk checked all of them. Now, I'm no high-level mixed martial artist or Mma coach but it sounded like Yair's corner were telling him to do the same thing. But I'm pretty sure the fight ending sequence was initiated by Volk catching a kick up the middle, so what do I know? 

Editors Note: It was a leg-kick not a high-kick. 

Robert Whittaker vs. Dricus Du Plessis 

Whittaker is indeed old. However, I haven't seen anything to lead me to believe that Dricus is some next level middleweight. And I've watched all of his fights since last year. Dricus is a former champion in a different promotion and he's been fighting professionally for a deceptively long time so I'll give him that edge. He's probably had a game plan for Whitaker for a very long time. 

But this is Robert Whittaker. Can Dricus execute? I doubt it. 

Split Decision for Dricus. 

Post-Fight reflection: I'm not surprised. I didn't think he'd TKO Robert in the second round, but I knew anyone saying Dricus would get finished immediately was dead-ass wrong. I definitely thought it would be a drawn out stand-up war and Dricus would win on points. I think a lot of people were discounting that Robert has been fighting for ten years, and never even defended his belt. Whereas Dricus has been fighting for the same amount of time and did defend his belt (albeit in another promotion). He never was going to get walked down or not put up a fight. He said post-fight that he had indeed been watching Whittaker for years, and that he had been training with karate practitioners during camp. 

What I'm saying is that I was 10,000% right to assume that Dricus already had a game plan for taking out Whittaker. And goddamit, he executed.

Now I can say that he is next-level. 

I Told Y'all That Charles Oliveria Was on Another Level

Let's be 10,000% honest with ourselves. We all knew that this fight was going to end this way. I feel really, really sorry for Beniel because he spent the last decade of his life climbing the ranks of a version of the lightweight division that doesn't exist anymore. It's even more upsetting that the dude was optimistic enough to say he's willing to fight for the belt at 38. That shit is probably not happening. He probably won't be able to compete for much longer. He's chinny and he's old, and he's reached the level of competition where those things definitely matter and they will definitely get you fucking knocked out. It happened to Tony Ferguson. Dana White Privilege unfortunately exists. 

And he was going up against the fucking Octopus from the Bronx. As cringe-worthy as it may souond, watching Charles use all eight points of contact (fists, elbows, knees, and feet) in his fights is what made my ass start pursuing Muay Thai. That motherfucker hits you with every part of his body that he can. Look at how he finished Beniel. He fucking kicked him in the side of his head and then dove in for the finish immediately. It was not fun to watch that happen to Beniel. Given, that's bound to happen to any human being that fights Charles Oliveira, but it's always fucking scary to see how quickly he finishes people. He lets his hands go and lets them go and lets them go until whoever he is fighting is absolutely bloodied or disorientated or both. Once he was on the canvas and Charles was on top of him, Beniel looked like a terrified deer in headlights trying to defend himself. And he was only on the ground for five seconds max.

Credit to Gorilla Pen Combat for this cage-side footage...

Charles is scarily good and still in my mind the baddest motherfucker on the planet. I don't care who he loses to. Beneil Dariush stood absolutely no chance and it honestly felt like this was a lopsided fight to quickly get him out of the title picture.

Early June Reading Roundup

Guess who hasn't stopped reading? Anyways, let's go ahead and hop into some of the information I've picked up from my reading in the past few weeks starting with -

No More Mr. Nice Guy

I started reading this book again a few months back because my initial notes on it were not the best. Regardless, I just finished part of the book that emphasizes how Nice Guys (if this terminology confuses or upsets you, please pick up the book) often operate from a place of powerlessness and shame, refusing to do anything different. The big idea of this part of the book is to embrace life as it is, problems, chaos, conflict, and all. The book says that no matter how much we try to project, bottle up our emotions, act immorally, or refuse to set boundaries, we cannot stop life from being what it is. Life is worth fighting for, and not fighting for it is like trying to grab water.

I'd elaborate a little more on how those things can be done, but honestly, I'd prefer to just plug the book and allow y'all to dive deeper into those topics, if need be. This is a roundup, not a summary. (Editor's Note: the hell is the difference?)

You have to put your hands up and fight or life will kick the shit out of you. You may not always win, but the only way to lose for certain is to never fight.

Rich Dad, Poor Dad

Holy hell, this book espouses some essential knowledge. I've just dove into the second chapter, where Robert Kiyosaki talks about how as a child, his best friend's rich father took him under his wing and taught him about money. But he didn't teach them in the traditional way. He had young Robert work manual labor and pushed him to the brink of anger and fear to get him to learn. 

Some insightful things I've picked up from this book (and from everything else I've been reading) is that making financial decisions out of fear of poverty or greed will cause you nothing but pain. Because money cannot solve those problems. I don't want to get too preachy but I've actually come to find out that making any kind of decisions out of fear will ultimately screw you over in the long run. 

I cannot endorse this book more. Not because it's some well of hidden financial knowledge or because it's making me rich. I endorse this book because it's introducing me to a different way of thinking about money. And I think everyone can benefit from that.

The 6 Pillars of Self-Esteem

I've finally reached the second or third pillar of self-esteem in this book. And that pillar is to live with self-responsibility. And boy, this section of the book made me cry (yet again). This book really makes me want to go read the Chronicles of Narnia or Hop on Pop because it's a tough read. 

In terms of self-responsibility, the book basically says that none of us has the right to use anyone else to get our needs met or (and this is the part that made me upset) to passively allow ourselves to be used to meet someone else's needs. There are five or six sections that break this idea down, but honestly, they're just further stating the same harsh truth over and over. No one is coming to save a single one of us, and if we want something out of life, we have to get up and go get it. It doesn't matter if we were born with a silver spoon or if people have handed things to us our whole lives. It doesn't matter if we're shamans or blessed pastors or making zillions of V-Bucks. In order to build self-esteem we have to take responsibility for our own lives, our own trajectories, and our own thoughts. There is no other way. No matter who we are. 

The Book of Five Rings

I'd like to begin with a disclaimer that, despite this book emphasizing that the only way to properly understand it is to actively practice the principles it explains, I am not in any position whatsoever to be actively practicing military strategy.

The Book of Five Rings consists of five different scrolls that explain various aspects of the way of strategy as seen by the author. I have just finished reading the Fire Scroll, which outlines ideals and specific tactics that can be employed to achieve victory in combat.

Some of my favorite tactics from this scroll include:

1. Knowing Disintegration: This involves understanding when your enemy is weakened and seizing the opportunity to finish them off.

2. Knocking the Heart Out: This entails completely dismantling any notions your enemy may have of defeating you.

3. Small and Large Perspective: This requires comprehending both the bigger picture and the intricate details of your actions, and being able to shift focus between them when progress is not being made.

4. Letting Go Four Hands: This refers to completely changing tactics when faced with a stalemate.

The scroll concludes by stating that there are no other tactics, mindsets, or strategies to be employed in military strategy. As a noncombatant, I cannot speak to the validity of this claim, but interestingly, the next scroll opens with Musashi vehemently criticizing and dismissing every other school of combat, asserting that he will prove them to be foolish and wrong. The Wind Scroll serves as Musashi's definitive argument against any alternative approach to strategy apart from his own. I am genuinely excited to read it.

It could be the translation, but everything in this book possesses such matter-of-factness that it feels like some kind of dogmatic text. This is understandable because, at its core, the book deals with successfully navigating life-or-death scenarios, which are not to be taken lightly or joked about. 

Unlimited Power 

I intended to read this book before I read Atomic Habits, at the beginning of the year, but I couldn't find a copy of it, anywhere. So far, it's one of the most interesting things that I've read in a long while. I won't spill the beans (partially because I learned a lot of stuff that I need to reflect on) just yet about the big idea. But just know that unlimited power really means unlimited communication ability and knowledge. 

The Power of Now 

To be honest, I only read the introduction of this book, and for now, I'm going to set it aside and prioritize reading "Unlimited Power" instead. The author, Eckhart Tolle, is known as a spiritual teacher, and in this book, he shares his journey to becoming a teacher and provides answers to various questions asked during his seminars and lectures. It's like his own version of "Meditations" or "The Prince."

While I know that many people have found this book helpful, I'm not really eager to dive into the mystical ramblings of a German guru. Personally, I'd rather watch Sadhguru's videos for spiritual insights. I hope you understand that I say this with respect, but this particular book doesn't resonate with me at the moment.

Closing Thoughts

You know. Life is a big wave. It doesn't have a set shape or form. We just have to ride that motherfucker the best way we know how. No one can give you your surfboard or tell you what shape your wave is going to be or when it's going to come. But one thing I can say is that you have to ride that wave.

Late May Reading Roundup

At this point, I'm only really posting these reading roundups as a way to better remember what I've read.  I read a lot and it feels like robbery not to at least try to share some of the information that I'm learning. This post is somewhat of a follow-up to the previous reading roundup, where I talked about Dating Essentials for Men, the Four Agreements, Atomic Habits, and The Book of Five Rings. This time I'm going to be talking about some other books that I've started reading in the past few weeks. 

So let's get into it -

Rich Dad, Poor Dad

I read all day and have a Stem degree and countless academic accolades, yet I just taught myself how to ride a bike in March. Hell, I just figured out what sunburn is three weeks ago. 

My point is that it doesn't matter how much academic knowledge you have, you don't know what you've never been taught. Period.

And that's one of the big ideas of Rich Dad, Poor Dad. You can be the world's smartest scientist or sexiest model and still struggle financially because no one has taught you anything about money (or they taught you the wrong things)l. I'm only in the first chapter, but I'm looking forward to reading further and applying what I've read. 

And speaking of applying what you read -

The Book of Five Rings

For clarity, this book is divided into four different sections (which the book refers to as scrolls) that explain separate aspects of strategy. I'm currently reading the Fire Scroll, which talks about the intricacies of combat and outlines different tactics. Obviously, in this century, and in a noncombatant position of life you can't literally practice these strategies. 

[insert Luke Rockhold "I'm a samurai" clip] 

I've been using the strategies in different areas of my life. The tactic of letting go of four hands (which is when you change your approach to a problem after a period of little progress) has been invaluable in figuring things out. The biggest lesson I've learned from this book is to know what your tools are for and to use them for what they are for in seriousness. Musashi was the best at what he did because he practiced excellence and understood every little aspect of what he was doing. This is the Way that the book endorses  in all things.

The 6 Pillars of Self-esteem

I talked about this book during my last post. Currently, I've reached a section in this book that espouses self-responsibility as an integral part of self-esteem. Last time, I mentioned that this book is difficult to read because it makes me feel irresponsible and immature. I'm realizing that it's harder to read because it forces me to accept that many people have horrific self-esteem and try to drag down other people without knowing it. This book says that self-esteem is built through building consciousness and awareness. Sometimes becoming aware is very painful. Reading this book sometimes makes me cry because it highlights the errors in thinking that led to many of the mistakes I've made. And it also makes me feel hopeful, because I'm coming to understand that I'm the only person responsible for fixing any kind of errors I've made. 

As an aside, the author of this book was one of Ayn Rand's lovers. The guy mentions her in the book occasionally, and his romance with had a very observable impact on his life and career. Call me an ass, but every time I hear that Ayn Rand was out here breaking hearts, it makes me laugh my head off. It also highlights that my understanding of love and attraction is kinda naive but that's another story.

Anyways, tune in next time when hopefully I'll have finished one of these books and can give my complete thoughts on what I've learned. 

February - May Reading Roundup

It's been a metric ass-ton of time since I posted one of these. I think in February I was trying hella hard to read two pages out of two different books a day. I read five now on a good day. Which is about five hours dedicated to reading a day. 

It sounds like a lot, but I assure you, there are many different things sprinkled in between. I don't just sit down and read for five hours straight. And I'm not plowing through five books daily (that's the goal), I'm going excerpt to excerpt taking notes. This post is going to be tame because I feel some of the questionable stuff I've posted here is killing my fucking career prospects. But at this point, it ain't like I'm up to my neck in job offers, in the first place. Admittedly I find it embarrassing to talk about some of these books. I'm trying to teach myself to fall in love with the actions that I do and not the anticipated rewards. Even though according to one of these books that's not how the brain works...

The Four Agreements

The Four Agreements is a relatively short book at 84 pages, which can be read in an afternoon (which took me a month to read). This book offers a fascinating take on ancient Toltec wisdom and the path to freedom, explaining how most people think thoughts that are not their own, and these thoughts can be negative and do them harm. Don Miguel Ruiz and his son dedicate their lives to preserving the principles of ancient Toltec wisdom in modern literature, which I admire.

But here's the big idea. The path to Toltec freedom is to wake up every day and to take an oath to be yourself. That's all. Be your fucking self. Do your fucking best no matter what. Love everyone. Do no harm. especially not to yourself.

Dating Essentials for Men

On this blog, I have a pretty storied history with the works of Dr. Robert Glover. He's a therapist who writes books on masculinity and self-help. Or at least, that's the image he presents to sell his books. They're usually much more introspective and melancholic reading than you'd initially presume. Dr. Glover is damn good at making you remember that you sometimes literally can't judge a book by its cover.  

Once again, Dr. Glover pulls the caper of baiting readers with a specific topic and then doing a 180 and shifting to another subject entirely. As a whole, the book focuses on building social skills and working on personal flaws through effort and dedication instead of selling pickup techniques. And by the time you're reading the dating shit, you've made so many life changes that you don't even give a shit about that part anymore. The problem was the way you thought about the problem. Not the problem itself. I cannot stress enough that this book is not about pick-up techniques or trying to become James Bond; it's about changing one's worldview to lead a healthier life. 

The first and most important half of this book is a neuroscientific deep-dive into insecurities, self-limiting beliefs, and isolation, exploring why some men experience them and how to overcome them through effort and dedication. This "Mastering Your Mind" section is the book's most significant and valuable portion. 

For me, the book's impact was significant. I wound up in the same room with Steven Spielberg, I got free tons of shit and I've done tons of things that I never would've tried before. I also came to realize that I had already gotten ALOT of attention from women in my life, but I either wasn't paying attention or didn't know what the fuck was going on at the moment, because I (very ironically) was beating myself over the head for being unsuccessful with women and all kinds of unhealthy shit. 

You will never be able to receive or appreciate anything in life if you don't hold onto, love, and embrace what you already fucking have. This book taught me that. 

Atomic Habits

Atomic Habits and Dating Essentials had a significant impact on me when I read them simultaneously. This is why I can adamantly say that the shit in both books works.  I've been reading three books a day and have rebuilt multiple relationships, and made significant progress on things I never would have attempted before. Reading these two books was like a one-two punch, rewiring the way I thought about thinking. I now know I can change myself quickly and orient myself toward anything I want.

The most significant benefit of Atomic Habits was its emphasis on using automation. I took this to heart and started using ChatGPT to do everything I didn't need to do myself. This included finding answers to things I didn't know how to solve, which led me to start asking questions about myself and the things I've learned. In the end, I began writing down my life story, deep-diving into the different aspects of the things I learned and the intricacies of my life. This process has kinda changed the way I see and do things and it solidified to me Dr. Glover's view that there is nothing inherently wrong with any of us. 

The 6 Pillars of Self-Esteem

Every now and then a book comes along and it calls you an immature, irresponsible man-child and tells you to get your shit together. I call those books soul-rippers, because your mind winds up in therapy questioning who you are after you read them.

I don't want to be treated so harshly. But if no one has ever told you to (or showed you how to) act like a fucking adult then you need to hear it from somewhere, even if it is a damn book. 

I'm still reading The 6 Pillars of Self-Esteem, and so far, it has been a challenging read that is difficult to put down. It's been harder to read than No More Mr. Nice Guy (which was probably the hardest thing I've ever read in my life), and I find myself wanting to read fiction instead. Nonetheless, it's a beautiful book, and I'm enjoying what I'm reading so far. Most of the time, the content is painful, but there is nothing wrong with that. 

My biggest takeaway has been that I'm a real person and my actions have very very real consequences regardless of whether I acknowledge them or not. It doesn't matter how much someone obstructed my autonomy in the past, I'm a man with his own willpower and capabilities good and bad. 

The world isn't a motherfucking nursery. Everyone got their shit kicked in. We all just gotta deal with it. That's the essence of this book. 

This Trivium quote always resonated in my head over the years, but it wasn't until a week ago that I fully understood what Matt Heafy meant when he penned it. That's growth.

Another positive takeaway has been the book highlighting how much damage people do to themselves by denying their own talents. And it's made me realize that I'm a fucking prodigy and I always have been, but that's another story for another day. I've got to figure out what I'm going to do with this newfound knowledge. 

The Book of Five Rings

Don't try to practically apply this book. It's a strategy book. 

This book is about mastery in all different parts of life. It's helpful for everyone to read something like this book. Especially in tangent with the other books that I've read. One big takeaway from what I read today was to make sure that if your enemy is ever hurt in combat go ahead and properly and decisively finish him so he doesn't recover and finish you. That's some obvious shit -

The big takeaway for me was that Musashi said you're lazy and careless if you don't do this. And then he refuses to explain further. Musashi does this all throughout the book. This book talks about all kinds of things that most civilized people wouldn't dream about in gorey detail. But there's passages where the book will say something completely archaic, end the explanation with "worrying about the minor details is some sissy shit" and then continue on as if that isn't a complete break from seriousness. I think the translator was trying to be funny. 

Anyways, yeah. Books are fun and promote personal growth...

Rebuilding Yourself and Maintaining Good Health

 

The Six Million Dollar Man is an old TV show that aired in the '70s. The show is about a pilot named Steve Austin (not that one), who crashes a test flight into the ground and undergoes an emergency procedure to become a cyborg crime fighter.  I presume his crimefighting activities consist of running around stopping bank robberies and delivering anti-drug PSAs to kids. I honestly don't know. 

As you can probably tell I've never actually watched the show in my life. I don't care about the show. I fucking love the intro and the entire concept. Ever since I first saw it, I fell in love with the notion of a guy getting into an accident and being rebuilt "stronger, better, and faster" with science.  Honestly, every time I feel kind of down, or I've been on a bad streak of luck, I think of this intro. And it gets me going.

I have the tools to rebuild myself. Hell, we all have the tools to rebuild ourselves. It's just about finding the right ones and getting good at using those tools in the right way. Just like those scientists went into Steve's brain, rewired it, and fixed him up, we can look into our minds and do some rewiring and fixing.

We're all Six Million Dollar People (or 42 Million Dollar People, adjusted for inflation)...

How Not To Get A Job or Get Hired Ever: An Interactive Tutorial on Cleaning Up Your Online Presence

To be streamed at a future date -

The UFC 287 Main Event Was Somewhat Surprising

Although I wasn't rooting for Izzy myself, his winning by second-round knockout, was definitely in the realm of bizarre possibilities. He rocked Periera in the first fight, and he has more experience under his belt. Now, when Adesanya made it to the second round I questioned myself how in the hell he'd be able to stop Pereira without dragging the fight all the way out and being perfect for 25 minutes,. And I immediately thought that whoever faints the most wins. But Pereira was also a kickboxer, he knows that shit, as well.

Watching Pereira fight anyone is scary. It's just a matter of time before he finishes it. But I think we all know that Izzy has won and lost tons of championships. It doesn't matter that Pereira knocked him out twice, Israel has the edge in experience when it comes to MMA. And honestly, I wasn't really sure what to expect after the first round. Izzy was winning the first fight for 23 minutes. And then he lost. Trying to get the decision against someone like Alex isn't a safe path to victory. 

But seemingly out of nowhere, Izzy backs up from their exchange in the middle of the cage all the way to the fence. Pereira obviously follows him and pressures him and starts teeing off. But unlike the first fight, he isn't really tagging Izzy. And then Izzy peeks out and hits Alex so hard that he stumbles back. And then as Alex is raising back up from getting rocked, Izzy hits him again and Alex falls onto the canvas. Izzy mounts him to go for the hammer fist, but it is clear that Pereira is already completely out.

I was halfway expecting Israel to drag the shit out to a decision by avoiding Pereira's left hand. But nah, this man stepped into the fire and went back to the same position that he lost the first fight in.

And instead of losing again, he fucking knocked out Pereira this time. 

This shit is so smooth, it feels scripted.

On further reflection, this was probably one of my favorite moments of watching MMA. I don't think I ever screamed as loud as I did when Izzy knocked out Pereira. I remember being on the edge of my seat the whole time during their first fight, waiting for a whole five rounds for Izzy to take that left hand and fall down. So this time I had that same tension. 

But Izzy pulled out the one damn thing I knew he could. Experience. Why in the flying fuck would someone repeatedly and intentionally back themselves up against the cage? And when Pereira got hit the first time, it's like time slowed down. And then Izzy hit him again and mounted him and I was about to fall off the couch. And I couldn't help but yell. I think I yelled for like a whole two or three minutes.

I was rooting so hard for Usman to get his belt back and he just couldn't do it. So seeing Pereira out cold on the fucking canvas was somewhat cathartic. I like Pereira. I think we all do. You can't not like him. He's a freak of nature with a death touch and he was a massive talent in his sport. Everyone loves those guys. Then he comes over to MMA and beats the reigning champion. Alex is a fucking badass. 

But he damn near lost the fight and I will maintain that from the second round onward Izzy fought like a jackass. That said I did get a vibe of "This guy is a fucking amateur and I wasn't taking him seriously last time" from Izzy. 

And Alex was motherfucking out. It looked really bad. There are just so many things to take away from that still of him unconscious on the canvas. One, that motherfucker is freakishly large, and two, he's old. He stayed out for a good ten to fifteen seconds. I don't like seeing that shit. He shouldn't be fighting again until at least November or December.

 

Fighters I'm Looking Forward to Watching

Editors Note: I meant to publish this prior to UFC 287 and fucking forgot. The content is still up to date for the most part, so I'm publishing it now. To be proofread and revised. 

I get accused of being a casual MMA fan quite frequently. And honestly I understand the accusations. But, it's not that I'm a casual, I catch every PPV, and almost every card. It's that I've only been watching MMA for a year and a half. And there's a difference between researching the history of a sport, and actually watching it unfold live. 

Let me explain further.

Now that I follow MMA and give a shit about it, I actually pay more attention to the narratives around the fights. But the thing is no matter what, I can't experience all of the stuff the same way by rewatching fights that have already happened. 

For example, If I already knew that Alex Pereira was going to TKO Izzy when I watched UFC 281 (which I kinda did, but that's beside the point), I wouldn't have given a flying fuck about what I was watching. But I was gripped by every fucking aspect of the fight. Every punch that landed, every kick that was loud enough to hear. Every time someone slightly looked they were getting dropped. I was glued to everything that was going on. And we know why. Izzy had been champion for years and had completely cleared the fuck out of the middleweight division. But he couldn't win at light-heavyweight. His entire game plan was nullified by someone because they were bigger than him. And there was all the complaints about every defense being a lackluster point fight. 

And here came his Kryptonite. A massive kickboxing double champion, that could knock people out wihh one punch. In fact, he beat Izzy twice already, and the last time he knocked him out and retired him from the sport. He'd already knocked out a ranked fighter. This guy was the perfect person to dethrone Izzy and get the middleweight division back to exciting sluggers, instead of embarrassing snoozefests. He was as big as a light-heavyweight (the only loss of Izzy's career was at that weight). And he could close the distance and hit Adesanya. And he could also knock you out with one untelegraphed punch. I knew it was Izzy's time when he rocked Pereira in the first round, and the dude was still standing two rounds later. But I didn't actually know for certain. That was the fun of it. Watching all of these questions being answered live from my TV.

Now if someone were to have started watching MMA in January of this year, all they'd know about the Izzy vs. Pereira fight is that Izzy lost his belt. It doesn't really mean much. It already happened.

I've only just recently moved into the former category. So I understand when people don't like my takes or tell me I don't understand MMA, or call me a casual over and over again. So I figured it made sense to talk at length about the little MMA I have watched, and the shit I'm excited for in the future.

Of course, I'm heavily looking forward to Masvidal vs. Burns, this weekend. I think that Masvidal is going to get battered and submitted. It is not going to be good. I'm honestly looking forward to how the entire welterweight title picture will slip and slide this year.

Charles Oliveira

His next fight is going to be up against a tested veteran with insane submission skills. He's already beaten the shit out of the other top-two-ranked guys. Before his belt was stolen he was on an insane streak of submissions, that made him look like a monster. I love when he'd get slightly tapped and then would fall onto the canvas on his back waiting for his opponent to get on the ground, like he was hurt. 

And the way he fights is captivating.  Watching Charles fight is a display in the Art of Eight Limbs. He's like a whirlwind of action, throwing knees, kicks, elbows, and punches from every direction. I call it "Octopus-Style" fighting. And once he gets the fight to the ground, he's lightning-fast in his submission attempts. He's the epitome of a badass fighter in my mind.

When I first got into MMA, Charles was the lightweight champion, and everyone was raving about how stacked that division was. So naturally, I started seeing him as the baddest man in the sport. And honestly, I still do. Unless losing the belt has seriously messed with his head, he's going to be a tough nut to crack for anyone who steps in the cage with him. Anyone that can beats him will definitely shine brightly in the MMA world.

Alex Pereira Against Anyone That Isn't Israel Adesanya

He's got that monster left hook. And now he's knocked out the fucking champion and may do it again. Watching him fight is like watching a horror movie. You just hope and pray for his opponent to be able to stop him from getting close enough to hit them. But you just know every time, he's going to hit him them on the chin and it's going to immediately be over. 

I don't know or care or understand whether Izzy can beat Alex. It wouldn't seem likely that he's going to out of nowhere stop this double-champion in his former sport, who's already beaten him three times. And I also really think Izzy doesn't give a flying fuck on a rolling donut about the belt anyway.

Clearly, he's trying to collect all six Infinity Belts, and he already has his UFC stone.

But I also think the division will suffer if Izzy wins and doesn't rematch him again later on. And also in that scenario who the fuck else does Izzy fight? He's already ran through everyone in the division. He obviously can't win at light-heavyweight. He's too big to move to welterweight. Maybe Khamzhat will get a title shot? Izzy winning honestly would mess up the middleweight division's progress. 

But speaking of Khamzhat - 

Khamzat Chimaev

I understand that as an athlete (especially from a restrictive country like Chechneya) you have to maintain a distinct image and promote yourself. And being Chechneyan, you're not in this to just win a belt and go home. You're out here to somehow try to literally prove that your country has the best fighters in the entire world every single time that you step in front of a camera. I can understand the need to maintain an image. 

But it's just that this image is obviously fake. This guy is not crazy and not stupid enough to literally fight anyone, anywhere just so his ass can get arrested, deported, and likely worse. He's not some Chechneyan mobster who made it to the big leagues and can't contain himself. 

Or maybe he is... 

Either way, he's never underperformed. For all his antics about wanting to fight everyone, and not committing to one division, Khamzat has destroyed all but one of his opponents. I honestly don't think he'd continue to keep doing that at welterweight, but at middleweight I'm unsure. And he could definitely viably compete at light-heavyweight. 

I honestly don't care, win or lose, I'm interested in seeing how whoever stops him, stops him. Because he's definitely getting stopped before he touches a belt. 

Magomed Ankalaev

He ran through the light-heavyweight division and beat the former champion Jan Blachowicz. This is the guy that should fight Jiri Procházka and whoever eventually gets the title. He's the light-heavyweight number-one contender until Jiri gets back. I'd argue that Jiri should fight him first. But ultimately no matter what happens, whether he fights Jamahal Hill for the title or further down the line, whether he fights Jiri for the title or not, or whether he can continue to beat the fuck out of whoever the hell manages to climb up the light-heavyweight ranks, this guy is a helluva fighter. And I'd argue that he's the real light-heavyweight champion. 

Francis N'Gannou

Honestly, it's looking like this dude is going to negotiate himself into being retired. But he's Francis N'Gannou. If he goes to Bellator, he's going to take that motherfucking belt from Ryan Spann, easily.  If he goes to PFL, there's no one to really challenge him. He can go to RIZIN and do super-fights until he retires. He can get this boxing shit underway and contribute to the MMA striking vs. boxing debate. I'd love it if Jon Jones loses/vacates/gets stripped of the title, and Francis is still out there somewhere tearing through people. 

Also, it's Francis N'Gannou. 

Francis is just genuinely fucking scary, without having two human off-switches for haands. He is absolutely huge and has the physique of a superhero, he's from the bad part of Africa and he literally bled, sweat, and cried to get to Western Civilization. 

The man has talked about climbing over barb-wire fences, hiking through the desert, and having to trek through the forest eating out the garbage to get to America. With the life he's had, Francis could be 350 pounds, working at McDonald's and chainsmoking Marlboro's, and still be one of the scariest people on the planet. But he's a fucking professional fighter and an endurance athlete. 

I can't think of any other heavyweight in the world that should fight him. And unless Francis falls off, if someone beats him, that'll be the next guy to watch.

Anyone with the Last Name Nurmagomedov

I can't rely on my strategy of relying on anyone from the country of Dagestan to deliver my stellar MMA. So my new strategy is to invest my time in the tried and tested Nurmagomedov camp.

But there's indeed a catch. With Khabib gone, it's entirely possible that his affiliates will suffer horribly. I don't want to see that. I don't want to see Umar show up drunk to a press conference and misses weight and lose. I don't want to see Usman gas out and forget how to strike. That will probably turn me into a jaded MMA fan. I saw Islam gas out and be incapable of submitting a smaller man. I can't help but wonder whether this is because Khabib is gone. It's 95% likely that it isn't but I don't know yet.

And that's my point about the difference between being an MMA fan and just casually paying attention to it. I wouldn't give a flying fuck about any of the Nurmagomedov's if I'd never seen Khabib absolutely maul everyone get fought. 

Christian Lee

I don't know much about this motherfucker, but I do know he was the Lightweight One FC Champion, lost his belt, and then beat the FLYING FUCK out of the guy who took his belt in the rematch. It looked like he was fighting some amateur off of Streetbeefs or PFL. That's the kind of story I like to see in MMA. If Usman knocked Leon out in the second round in their rematch, I'd have loved it. If Valentina gets a rematch and knocks out whoever the hell just beat her, I'd love it. If my boy, Reinier De Ridder can come back and reclaim his heavyweight belt, I'd love it. 

The point is that Christian Lee did some cool shit and he looked cool, so now I'm looking forward to seeing what happens next.

Though as an aside, I'm genuinely starting to wonder if ONE has some fight-throwing issues because every other card a top contender or a champion gets his ass absolutely whooped. Dudes on unrealistically long winning streaks will all of a sudden lose so badly it's like they've only fought in their cousin's backyard. The talent gaps can't be that damn large. Maybe ONE just likes booking mismatched fights. If Christian Lee falls off after this, I'm not watching anymore ONE FC until they sign Ciryl Gane in four years. 

The Great UFC 284 Heist

I forgot to post this on Sunday. Whoops.

Now look, Volkanovski may not have won that fight last night, but he made Islam make this face.

That's an unmistakable look of sheer terror.

Islam is supposedly Khabib Nurmagomedov's star pupil and best protege. And honestly watching Khabib's highlights is what sparked my initial interest in MMA. The dude never ever got tired during a fight and he beat the dogshit out of everyone. Khabib was so skilled, he was like a videogame character with all the cheat codes enabled. He didn't even get cut or bleed once.

And unfortunately, Islam is not Khabib. Islam did not maul Volkanovski. Islam got his shit rocked. And furthermore, Islam got absolutely exhausted. 

Dagestanis have notoriously superhuman endurance. I've seen Dagestanis get choked out, knocked out in the first round, and all kinds of submitted, but I don't think I've ever seen a single one of them look even remotely tired. EVER. They don't get tired. 

And Islam was absolutely exhausted. 

Which is just a testament to how much of a badass Volk is. I haven't been watching MMA that long, but he did some shit I've never seen before. He tired out a Dagestani. 

And honestly, that's more than enough for me to take what I saw last night as sufficient revenge for what Islam did to Charles Oliveira in October. 

I feel like I'm too emotionally invested in this, so I won't go on any further.

A Casual MMA Fan's UFC 283 Roundup

You read the title. Let's get into it. Also I missed the first fight. 

Josiane Nunes vs. Zarah Fairn

There was a tiny bitch fighting a tall bitch. I don't have any problem with WMMA. But UFC's WMMA sucks dick. One FC's WMMA is stellar. Bellator has Cyborg. Hell, even Combate Global has decent WMMA. The UFC has like five bitches steamrolling everyone else and trading wins with each other. Apart from that, there are only like two or three other female fighters that aren't absolute snoozefests to watch. These two are not among the five exciting WMMA fighters worth watching. 

Nicolas Dalby vs. Warlley Alves

The welterweight fight was fucking boring. The dudes kept cracking the fuck outta each other and no one went down. There's nothing worse than a prelim fight that gets drug out to a bloodless decision. 

Brunno Ferreira vs. Gregory Rodrigues

I've never paid attention to this  Gregory Rodrigues guy. I've seen him fight, but I never gave a shit. Chat was blowing up about Buff Obama / Robocop and I had no clue who the fuck they were talking about. I do know one thing for sure, and it's that Buff Robomacop got knocked the fuck out. 

Cody Stamann vs. Luan Lacerda

Apparently, there was a bantamweight fight. The guy looked like a knockoff of Cody Garbrandt. The fight chat dubbed him Cody "Some Love." That is all. 

Ismael Bonfim vs. Terrance McKinney

Firstly, Terence McKinney looks like the fish from Shark Tale. Secondly,  I thought it was weird, rude and disrespectful that his American ass went out there with a Brazilian fight kit. So I was rooting against his stupid ass from the get-go. If you want home team support, then support the home team. You wouldn't go to the Olympics and wrestle for Germany or some random ass country. And you definitely wouldn't wrestle for the USA and then run around with a Japanese flag after you win. It's nonsensical.  If you want to wear another country's colors for no reason, then I'm certainly not rooting for you. And his mouthpiece got knocked out and then he got knocked the fuck out right afterward. Despite commentary saying it was his debut, I could tell that this Bonfim guy was a veteran from the way he was trading.  I look forward to watching more of his scraps.

Jailton Almeida vs. Shamil Abdurakhimov

The Dagestani got wrestle-fucked and it looked like he wasn't even trying. Every time a round started, homie got effortlessly taken to the ground. A disadvantage of not having watched MMA that long is that I'm not always familiar with all the fighters. Maybe the black dude is just a phenomenal grappler. But honestly, it just looked like the Russian guy was gassing out every round and giving up his back. It definitely wasn't entertaining.

Gabriel Bonfim vs. Mounir Lazzez

The second Bonfim tapped out his opponent in the first round. I didn't know of these guys before this card, but now I gotta go back and watch their shit because they're definitely finishers. This shit didn't even look competitive.

Thiago Moisés vs. Melquizael Costa

Uh, I'm aware of the fact that Thiago Moises can scrap. I've actually seen it. And I think Mr. Colorful was a late replacement because Moises' opponent pulled out. When things hit the ground it honestly looked like Rainbow Hair gave up and tapped quick as hell. I'm not a grappler and I don't know jujitsu. Maybe he was about to lose a fucking limb; I wouldn't be able to tell. But to me, it looked like homeboy knew he wasn't getting out of the choke and tapped immediately. 

Which is respectable, I guess. Everyone doesn't have to do it the Dagestani way and refuse to tap. This sport consists of half-naked men hitting each other in the face, and I'm okay with that. The only times I've genuinely winced while watching MMA were when someone was refusing to tap. I have the image of Magomed Magomedov squirming and going limp between Patrick Mix's legs burned into my memory. Which is quite traumatizing. 

If you can't get out of the sub, you should probably save yourself some brain damage. So hats off to Rainbow Hair.

Shogun Rua vs. Ihor Potieria

I only knew two things about Shogun prior to this fight. I knew Shogun Rua was that guy who won the Pride Light Heavyweight Grand Prix. 

Pride FC hasn't existed since 2007. 

And I knew Jon Jones submitted him early on in his career. 

UFC 285 will be my first time watching Jon Jones fight live, and I've been watching MMA for a year.

So when everyone in the chat said Shogun Rua would be fighting, I said "Huh? Isn't that guy like 47?"

Nonetheless, he lost this retirement fight spectacularly. Like Cowboy, and Frankie, and Joanna, and Rockhold, and Aldo all did during their retirement fights. 

Johnny Walker vs. Paul Craig 

Anyways, I don't have anything to say about Johnny Walker finishing Paul Craig. I thought that Walker was going to lose a limb, for sure, but the fight didn't even make it to the ground. 

Jéssica Andrade vs. Lauren Murphy

Again, the UFC's WMMA is god-awful. Digression, but someone decided to spam in our chat, that everyone should stay the hell away from Jessica Andrade's Onlyfans. So of course, I went and checked it out. 

Don't look at Jessica Andrade's Onlyfans....

I don't know if any of you have also had the misfortune of being flashed by someone who's mentally ill, but Andrade's Onlyfans has those vibes. The only thing I could think was that she should put her clothes on and never, ever, ever take them off in front of a camera again. 

But anyways, the fight sucked. I think it should've been stopped because it was fucking boring. Murphy decided to block half of the punches with her face. And despite that, Murphy never even so much as wobbled. And she barely landed anything herself. It was like watching a bear get repeatedly stung by a bunch of bees. No matter how many times he gets stung the bear isn't going to actually get hurt, and he also isn't going to kill any of the bees. At first, it was exciting, but then it was boring and predictable, and I couldn't wait for the fight to be over. 

Brandon Moreno vs. Deiveson Figueiredo

The first card that I watched live was UFC 270. I had no idea who the two Hispanic midgets rolling all over the octagon were at the time. I just wanted to see N'Gannou and Gane slug it out. I called Figgy vs Brandon 3 "gay and too long." 

Fast forward one year and four months of a Fight Pass subscription later, and I still don't give a fuck about Brandon Moreno or Deiveson Figueiredo. I thought it was badass when Figgy hopped into the cage after Brandon won at 277. But I feel like the UFC's flyweight division is lacking. So until Brandon or Figgy go over to a promotion that actually has a stacked 125-pound division (read a country where the average height isn't 5'10), I don't give a shit.

All that said, I was rooting for Figgy because he has that drip. 

And he lost by a fucking doctor's stoppage, and I was unexpectedly upset. 

Jamahal Hill vs. Glover Texeira

Yeah, this was a helluva fight. When Glover went down in the second round, I was sure the fight was over. But that motherfucker refused to go out. And there's a certain point, where a fight turns into a savage beating. And I think at about the 347th unchecked head kick from Jamahal, this one became a beating. It was kind of abundantly clear by the third round, that Glover wasn't going to manhandle Jamahal. But it also was abundantly clear that Jamahal wasn't going to knock Glover out. And slowly the "fight" turned into an "insanely tough old man getting his ass beat by a professional fighter." 

I'll admit that seeing Jamahal break down and cry when he realized that he'd won was heartwarming. 

I fell asleep when Glover fought Jiri (it was my second or third card, and I hadn't started drinking coffee to stay up yet) so I missed out on the "insane war "that happened.

The Brazilian crowd was pretty tame. At least, for a Brazilian crowd. I'm used to reading reports about Brazilian football76ft hooligans burning down stadiums and starting riots, so the fact that some folks threw some beer cans was kinda underwhelming. I fully expected that some crazed Brazilians were going to try to bumrush the cage and attack Jamahal. But alas, the fucking stadium was empty during the last fight.