No-Fap and the Deaf Mind Map

Hey-oh!

I'm sitting here on my front porch getting ready to meditate. I'm drinking a cup of joe and getting tickled by the coldness of the wind (or assaulted give or take.)

Today I'm going driving with my Dad. I'm looking forward to it but I'm not really looking forward to it. You see me and my dad get into a lot of arguments about things that we don't agree on. He's a firm believer but I'm a skeptic who doesn't really care about religion. When he first found out he used to get angry and grill me about it. But since I've left for college he's been more chill about it. He just takes not-so-subtle potshots at me whenever spirituality or religion comes up in conversation. Apart from that we're like 300% unified.

Let's transition to something a little bit more controversial.

That something is No-Fap... 

Let's transition to No-Fap.

For clarity No-Fap is a challenge where you abstain from pornography, masturbating, and orgasming. (My longest streak was 129 days. Yep, from June to October I was about that celibate life.) It's a bit of a community and sometimes we call ourselves Fapstronauts. And if you think a bunch of dudes sitting around talking about how they don't jack-off is the lamest thing ever so did I. Until I had so much pent-up energy that a trip to the corner store was the equivalent of Hank Moody walking through an all-girls swinger's bar. The third month in you can become excited about literally anything. You've got to have someone to relate to about the struggle... 

Anyway, I've got a two-day No-Fap streak going for me which is nice. I think at least while I'm here at home I'm going back on No-Fap. You see masturbating changes your state of mind after you do it. With the amount of arguing and fighting and just general high-stress shit that goes on in this environment, I can tell I need to be on my A-game 24/7. So I'm putting my Fapstronaunt suit back on for now.

It's exactly like this, just with 80% less smiling.

And now for something completely different.

As you may recall if you read the post from yesterday I've been practicing a specific type of mindfulness meditation. And this morning it went amazing. These are the kinds of meditation sessions I strive for every day. These are the kinds of meditation sessions that keep me meditating every single day.

This morning I focused on the inner hearing channel. Which means I only focused on the things I heard in my head. I literally could've done this meditation in a blindfold and earplugs (in fact that probably would have helped). At first it was bit weird. I had all sorts of songs playing on Radio 102.7 Joe's Head. It went from All That Remains to Foo Fighters to Suicide Silence to damn Billy Idol (It was kinda like using the "shuffle all songs" feature on my phone's music player.)

Like a box of chocolates with the kitchen sink and a couple of rocks thrown in.

But the gold came after I turned the radio down. I eventually got tired of having to focus in on my boring thoughts and started to wonder. Can you think without hearing it in your head? Is there a way to turn off that inner voice? Do people who were deaf from birth have that voice too? Surely in order to process things in their minds they have to. What does it sound like?

We need to go deeper...

More importantly, since deaf people don't know what we call things that means they have their own labels for them. And their own language only they themselves can understand. EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM. And they're not insane so it's not just erratic nonsense. This shit could actually be translated if there were a way to do it. There are literally hundreds of thousands of languages in this world that only one person can speak.  If only Professor X were real. Trippy as fuck.

Meditation takes you places you'd never find yourself otherwise. 

Soooo. I just got back from my High School. And boy, I'm not nearly as hated as I thought I was. Damn near everybody I interacted with when I was there spoke to me. Some of the people I used to always shoot the shit with approached me. Mr. Johnson also wants to talk with me later. For some reason. I saw Elijah, Caleb, and crew (some of my boys from back in high-school). They asked me about Rosemary. They obviously wanted to know if I was hitting that. 

I am not hitting that. 

Or anything for that matter.

I'm not even hitting the ground when I walk...

I'm not even hitting the talk button when I pick up the phone...

I'm not even hitting the keys as I type this...

I'm not even hitting-

You know, I feel like the message has been conveyed...

Anyways see ya! Wouldn't want to be ya (unless you're Bill Gates. Or James Bond. Or me at the end of today.) 

Know what, let me rephrase this -

See ya! 95% chance I wouldn't want to be ya!



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