Joe's (Totally Not) Diary: Alphabetically Reviewing My Music Collection Week 12: All Hail the Yeti Part 1

Happy New Year and welcome to Season Two of the best way to spend your Sunday. (Yes, I know it's Monday.) We're starting the year off right with one of the best bands I can think of All Hail The Yeti! AHTY were one of the first metalcore bands I started listening to and they pushed me through highschool. I can't count the amount of times I would drown out the awkwardness of being an adolescent with Screams From a Black Wilderness.

And since that's the album I'm the most familiar with, that's the one we'll be tackling this week. You see, going forward, a lot of the bands we're tackling will have 100s of songs. Instead of reviewing them all in one day, I'm going to split them up by album.

Before the Flames

Let's hop right into it. Something that sets All Hail the Yeti apart from any other band is that most of their songs tell a story or are references to pop culture. Before the Flames is no different.

The intro is wonderful. From the calm strumming to the crazy riffing to the expectant chugging of the pre-chorus. All accompanied by the unpolished screams of the vocalist. Then the cleans of the chorus that proclaim "We serve a lesser god!"

Although, I've got used to it over the years that post-breakdown, "Oh my God! What is happening?!?", is one of the funniest lines I've heard in a song. If you're not paying attention to the lyrics it's jarring as hell. Also, the melody with the screaming and singing towards the end is beautiful.

Plague Dance

Did you know that there was a plague that made a whole village spasm uncontrollably for three days straight? A literal plague dance. Unfortunately, that's not the plague this song is about but that's still metal AF. Here 'plague dance' refers to a ritual done to mourn for all of those killed by the plague. Which is still pretty metal. I also find the fact that the song kicks off with a Monty Python reference is hilarious.

Let the Night Roar

This song is about the Jonestown massacre. The title is a reference to the final sermon given before the sermon and a sample of it ends the breakdown. That breakdown kicks off with some amazing cleans and drumming. It sounds amazing.

Given the subject matter, the song repeatedly beckons you to 'smile and drink.' I don't have to go into detail about what that means. If you read along with the lyrics, the words of Jim Jones are screamed, while his followers' responses are sung. Something about that is morbidly fitting.

Mr. Murder

You may be thinking this is about the Stephen King book.

Ew, no.

This song is a tribute to the lead singer's best friend who passed away during the recording of this album. Metalcore legend Brock Lindow is featured, as he was also good friends with Mr. Murder. (I couldn't find anything on why they named the song that. Dude's name was Matt.) This is essentially All Hail the Yeti's 'Wish You Were Here.'

You can feel the emotion on this track as the vocalist is screaming way harder than usual. There are some references in the lyrics that are pretty personal. You can honestly tell these guys were genuinely best friends. Matt meant a lot to them. And the song hits home. Because we all have a friend like that, we never want to lose.

Lady of the Night

Groovy ass intro. Heavy ass screaming with a distortion effect for good measure. And then comes the chorus and it completely contrasts that. I love how the cleans and screams are layered during the chorus.

The bass is really prominent throughout. The guitar riffing feels really funky during the breakdown. Those last few riffs of the song accompanied by the 'Kill me! Lady of the night!' is the most badass thing of this album.

Witch is Dead

Y'all remember that scene in the OG Wizard of Oz when Dorothy first shows up in Oz and her trailer lands right on top of the Wicked Witch of the East? Did you know that All Hail That Yeti composed the 'Witch is Dead' jingle that the munchkins sing in that scene?

If you look closely you can see the vocalist making sure the actors get the words right.

Nah this one is about dumping (and possibly murdering) a chick who caused you a lot of pain. That ex that cheated on you with your best bro and then cheated on him with his uncle? This is a 'fuck you' to her. All Hail the Yeti are experts at writing relationship songs.

Instrumentally, this track is standard fare. Everything is on point. The good cop bad cop vocals hammer home the point of the chorus. There's some expert rhyming in the verses. The solo is brief but groovy. This one is a little bit more catchy and upbeat than usual. After all, it is based on a Wizard of Oz reference.

Daughter of the Morning Star

This one starts off pretty slow but it picks up the pace with the first chorus. And then the breakdown is straight insanity. But you already knew what you were in for with that title.

I want to say that this song is about a native witch killing some Christian settlers that disturb her home. The opening line of the song is "It was 1493" which is the year Columbus first docked in America.

Sun Will Never Set

These bros started sounding like Pantera, Mastodon, and something entirely unique all at the same time. The guitar tone is dirty and evokes Southern Metal. That distorted spoken interlude
The harmony between the vocalist and the bassist on top of the riffing sounds amazing. This track stands out. If anything makes me call All Hail the Yeti Southern Rock this song is it.

Which is hilarious, given that this is a song rejecting faith and the superficial for belief in what can be seen. Not a very Southern message if you ask me.

Fall of Core

There's nothing particularly interesting about the instruments here. But the lyrics are kind fo cringeworthy. This song is exactly what it says on the tin. It's a fuck you to (what All Hail the Yeti calls) posers and hipsters. This is the first time I've heard someone scream 'skinny jeans' and I never want to hear it again.

I hate scenies and posers as much as the next guy but I think it's a waste of time to dedicate a whole song to that. In fact, that makes you look like a grumpy elitist. Also, I don't think All Hail the Yeti are exactly the right folks to be calling out skinny jeans-wearing hipsters...

Maybe they're making an attempt at self-deprecation...

But if you hate posers so much that you feel like they're ruining your livelihood, then I guess it makes sense to write about it. To each his own.

Breaking the Wheel

This one isn't too different. The chorus is pretty catchy. And honestly I think that's the best thing about all of these tracks. At the very least the choruses are all pretty memorable. This is one of the few that will probably have you singing along.

The song is about indulgence and substance abuse. And not to get all general here but I'm going to have to take back what I said earlier. Most of these songs have lyrics that are either weird, or inconsistent throughout. It also doesn't help that some of the vocals are so incoherent that the words couldn't be transcribed. Honestly I hate to say this, but this song really highlights the fact that All Hail the Yeti don't have the best lyrics.

Nemesis Queen

This is the grooviest track of the record. This song is so groovy it sounds like Black Label Society with All Hail the Yeti's vocalist.

There's the constant riffing. The crooning cleans. The harsh vocals to contrast. And another catchy-ass chorus. And the guitarist unleashed his inner Zakk Wylde for that solo.

Angels Envy

Jesus Christ, I guess All Hail the Yeti is a metal band. This one starts off with a spoken and sang part and transitions into some hectic shredding and screaming. And then they repeat this for the next few minutes. Singing/ speaking and then a chaotic refrain. Then we get to the breakdown and it becomes 100% screaming. And I mean screaming. The vocals go up to 11 on the harshness. And then the track and the album end.

Wowee. That was a helluva track to end on.

Final Verdict / What Do I Think?

I already introduced AHTY as one of my favorite bands. I've been listening to them for years and that probably isn't going to change. That said, I really want to save my greater opinions on the band for next week.

As for this album, I've heard better. And I've certainly heard worse. It's consistent throughout. It doesn't suddenly switch genres in the middle of the record. (Oh, it happens. Just wait for All That Remains.) The production is pretty well-rounded. All of these songs, at the very least, have a catchy chorus. That's what keeps me listening to this band. Their songs get stuck in your head.

And honestly, it's so formulaic it kind of gets boring. Most of these songs follow a very specific structure. After a while, all of the songs meld together in my head and I can't tell them apart. To be honest, it sort of feels like I just listened to the same song 12 times in a row. Except it was slightly different every time.

I can't forgive that piss poor songwriting though. That's a musical sin.

Unfortunately, I'm starting not to like this band as much. However, we do have next week to take a look at their first self-titled album and a couple of other tracks. And I think that may shift my opinion back in the other way.

So come back next week for that. Or don't. I don't care.

Joe's (Totally Not) Diary

Monday, January 6, 2020

Alphabetically Reviewing My Music Collection Week 12: All Hail the Yeti Part 1