Monday, May 27, 2019

Working Class Snobs With Stupid Ass Jobs


© Demon Music Group LTD.


What the fuck is up? It's been forever since I posted here. I've been neglecting y'all, but I promise I'll be a better man. I'm gonna post more frequently and keep bringing the funnies. And you know why?





Cause I do it all for you guys. That and the nookie. 
© Shutterstock




But without further adieu and ass-kissing, let's get on to what we do best here. Talking about my morning -






I'm sitting here on the toilet listening to Embers Fall. Me and this band go way back. I reviewed their debut EP when I first started freelance writing in late 2017. The review got picked up by Spinditty less than a week after I finished it. They've been running ads on it since. I ain't seen a dime, which sorta ticks me off.

But it is the fifth result when you type 'The Faceless EP' into Google so I'm not too angry.



You know you're winning when
you show up before Spotify.



I'm just not too hot on the fact that I provided them with positive publicity and I'm not the one getting paid for it. (I oughta go take my shit down.)

In other news, the internet got turned off this morning. I find it hilarious that the day I decide to update the blog is the day Comcast decides to collect. I'm not worried, cause where there's a will, there's a way. I've blogged in the library before. Ain't nothing gonna stop me from posting but me.

And carpal tunnel. That would probably put me out of commission for a little while...




© Shutterstock



My grandmother wants to go walking this morning. I do not want to do that. I would much rather chill all day. I've got to go to work tomorrow and before I give the man his hours I'd like to give myself some rest.


I would just catch up at work, but I 
kinda like being employed.


Speaking of work, I hate my job man. But I'm pretty sure most Americans can say that. ('I hate my job' is practically a patriotic statement.) I won't disclose where I work because it's not a bad place of work. I'm just not the best guy to work there, y'know? Everyone isn't made to do everything.

I also realize I don't care much for pecking orders. Someone condescended to me about clocking out too slowly and my gut instinct was to tell her to go fuck herself and to proceed to clock out even slower. If she has a problem with the speed of which I depart from my money making opportunities she can blow me, cause it will never increase. However that someone was my area manager. A.K.A. Person who can fire me and everyone I work with. So I just fucked off. Needless to say, I probably won't last long here.

If I wind up getting banned from the store at least it will make for a funny story.




"And so I told her the only kind of job I need is a blowjob!"
© Shutterstock


But I guess it is what it is, y'know? I'm just glad I'm voluntarily working there. I couldn't imagine having to put in work at a place like that. I gotta respect the resilience of the working class.






Anyways, I'm done talking.

Peace out.




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